Dating Disaster
by popmonkey-sama
Summary: After the Trigun anime show had ended, everyone's life came very boring and especially their love life's ... but no worry, folks - 'Perfect Match' is here to help you to find your true love! XD
1. Perfect Match

**DATING DISASTER// PART 01 // PERFECT MATCH**

PG-13 (Because Trigun is K-13)

Humor/Parody (?)

By PopMonkey7

Description: After the Trigun anime show had ended, everyone's life came very boring and especially their love life's (if there even were one). But suddenly their problems has been solved; dating company 'Perfect Match' has arrived to the town and everybody wants to find that special one.

A/N: Oh this insanity! BWHUHAHHAHAHAAA!! BTW, I don't own Trigun, Mr. Nightow owns but I own the dating company, because I'm the boss! XD Note! All the characters are OOC, so this story would be possible and more interesting.

// O // O // O //

Wolfwood: Boring. -_-_?

Vash: 

Wolfwood: Maybe hell has been frozen

Vash: I dunno maybe

Wolfwood: Ever since the show ended, life has become so boring back in the show, there never was a day without action, now, the action is than can I get rid of Milly the hyper active pudding girl *deep sing* -_-_?

Vash: I though you liked Milly?

Wolfwood: I do like her when she's not trying to force me to marry her

Vash: Marry?! O.O Why you haven't told me? I'm your best friend! You lucky one I wish I could get married some day with a pretty girl ;_;

Wolfwood: Propose Meryl.

Vash: Huh?

Wolfwood: Ya heard me propose Meryl, marry her

Vash: Are you serious? O.o

Wolfwood: I'm a priest, Vash. T_T

Vash: Hmm Meryl Stampede Hihii no!

Wolfwood: Why not?

Vash: She will only slap me and blame everything I wanna a fairy princess not a slapping bitch.

Meryl: Who's slapping bitch, Vash? :-o

Vash: O.O;; Meryl um

Wolfwood: Vash meant you are Meryl.

Vash: WOLFWOOD!

Wolfwood: I'm bored go a head Meryl it's all yours. ^_^

Meryl: Thank you, Wolfwood.

Vash: Guys! O.O I'm your friend! You can't do that to me!

Meryl: Oh yeah just watch me! *slap*

Vash: +_+

Meryl: That was refreshing.

Wolfwood: You said it. ^_^

Vash: 56 beer bottles on the wall, 56 beer bottles on the wall x_x

Wolfwood: You have come soften, Meryl. Usually he faints right away

Meryl: You are right! O.O I can't believe that I'm starting to wish that Knives would be on the lose again.

Knives: Hi.

Wolfwood: Well, well it's devil himself ¬_¬

Knives: Hey, I haven't yet insult so shut up.

Vash: 81 beer bottles on the wall, 23 beer bottles on the wall, Vash: 6 beer bottles on the wall, millions of shiny knives on the wall x_x

Knives: May I ask what happen to my brother? ¬_¬

Wolfwood + Meryl: No.

Knives: Good. I didn't want to know. T_T

:: Knives sits on the couch next to Wolfwood, and Meryl sits next to Knives and Vash sings something odd on the floor ::

Wolfwood: Maybe there's something on the TV *turns TV on*

Knives: I wanna watch National Geographic.

Wolfwood: We are not watching some boring documentary films again! ._?

Meryl: I want to see the Young And Restless.

Wolfwood + Knives: O.o

Wolfwood: I though you don't watch TV much, because what was the reason, Knives?

Knives: There only comes some stupid soup operas and the Young And Restless is soup opera, Meryl You are not making any sense here.  
  
Meryl: I know, but I'm bored... I don't have anything else to do.

Vash: I think Ridge is best! ^_^

Everyone: O.o

Knives: Vash, he's in the Bold And The Beautiful, not in Young And The Restless ¬_¬

Vash: I know, but he's the best. ^_^

Knives: None of you are not making any sense! LEGATO!

Legato: *in kitchen surprise, surprise* YES, MASTER!

Knives: We are out to kill humans!

Legato: Hooray. -_\\ ß Legato is happy.

Knives + Legato: *leaves*

Wolfwood: Vash, shouldn't you stop them? They are going to kill humans. ¬_¬

Vash: O.o 

Wolfwood: 1

Vash: o.O

Wolfwood: 2

Vash: O.O Oh crap! *runs out* KNIVES! LEGATO! STOP!

Wolfwood: 3

Meryl: Slow headed moron. ¬_¬

Wolfwood: Well, at least he's on time. T_T_?

Meryl: Seriously, you shouldn't smoke inside.

Wolfwood: I know, but I try to keep Milly away.

Meryl: Wolfwood

Wolfwood: Before you ask why, I will answer you right away. I don't wanna get married! I'm a priest! I wanna keep my freedom! Okay? Understand it?

Meryl: Um, yes I understand, but I was just about to ask that could we watch Young And The Restless now

Wolfwood: O.o Oh um okay. *turns TV on*

Pretty women on TV: Is your life boring? So boring that you are watching Young and The Restless now??

Wolfwood: How did she know? O.ô

Meryl: I hate commercials -_-;;

TV-Women: Do you need more action in your life?

Wolfwood: Yes, please.

TV-Women: Is your love life well lame?

Wolfwood: Hell yeah!

TV-Women: If you answered yes to all of these questions yes, we have solution to you.

Wolfwood: You do? O.O

Meryl: -_-;;

TV-Women: 'Perfect Match' is your answer. We have thousand of lonely and bored persons like you waiting for a date or just a friend. Everyday we get tens of peoples together and make them happy. Do you wanna be like them? *shows a picture of a happy couple* If you do, just give us a call. The number is 1-800-BTG-IS-BEST. Or you can just visit our site and take our 'Love Machine' test what will pick your perfect match from thousands of persons. Call now. The number is -

Wolfwood: I'm calling, I'm calling! *picks up the phone* 1-800-BTG-IS-BEST 

Meryl: Are you really seriously going to call there, Wolfwood? O.ô

Wolfwood: Why not? I don't wanna marry Milly and have ten kids with her! This maybe be my last possibility to be free priest.

Meryl: T_T

Wolfwood: Hello?

Women on phone: Welcome to Perfect Match -

Wolfwood: I wanna date right away!

Women: That's why we are here; to help you get a date -

Wolfwood: Yeah, yeah get to the point! I wanna a women!

Women: What kind of company are you looking for, sir?

Wolfwood: O.o Um I dunno tall pretty lady who likes smoking priest?!

Women: Wait for a second, our machines are working right away and give your perfect date company would you like to hear out other special offers, sir?

Wolfwood: Special offers?

Women: Yes. We do lots of more than help people to find the perfect match. Perfect Match is more than a date service -

Wolfwood: I just want a date, that's all. T_T_?

Women: - we have this new hair spray for bold men -

Wolfwood: I'm good-looking guy with hair and who doesn't need anything else but a date -

Women: Maybe out new 'Relaxing Water Aerobic' video would be good for you, sir -

Wolfwood: I hate aerobic, especially water! T_T

Women: Ah, your result is ready.

Wolfwood: FINALLY! Who is it?

Women: A pretty women name Milly Thompson. I'm sure you two will be have a wonderful date -

Wolfwood: MILLY?! O.O Did you said Milly Thompson?

Women: Yes. Do you like to hear more about her, sir?

Wolfwood: Not thanks. *hangs up the phone* O.O

Meryl: Well, did you get a date? you don't seem to be happy.

Wolfwood: The result was Milly.

Meryl: What result?

Wolfwood: The machine said my perfect date company was Milly Thompson. O.O

Meryl: O.o Huh?

Wolfwood: I will go for a walk I need to start thinking about our kids names ;_;

Meryl: o.O

// O // O // O //

Vash: *hiding in a trash can, once again* Why Knives won't ever stop killing humans? ;_; It's so sad ya know.

Kuroneko: Nya! (I know)

Vash: *sniff* And Legato gees he's so scary. I can't do nothing when he's around. He always uses his mind powers and I don't even know who to use them like Knives do maybe I'm really a stupid ;_;

Kuroneko: Nya! Nya! (I agree. You are stupid as a wood stick.)

Vash: ¬_¬ Stupid cat

Kuroneko: Nya!! (SHH!)

Vash: O.O

Legato: Master, did you hear that voice? My left hand is shaking I think your brother is near.

Knives: Well, that means no killing humans today again. Life is so boring. I will kill myself soon.

Legato: O.O PLESE, MASTER NO! DON'T DO IT! DON'T KILL YOURSELF, KILL ME!!

Knives: ¬_¬ I was just joking and I won't kill you. You are all ready dead, Legato.

Legato: O.o Um, oh yes You are so wise, master. -_\\ -- Legato is REALLY happy.

Knives: -_- I know that all ready. Tell me something new.

Legato: Um, there's a new pet shop in the town??

Knives: Let's go there. I don't have anything better to do.

Vash: Pet shop? O.o

Legato: There is was a again master!

Knives: Forget it. Let's go use your MasterCard.

Legato: Um, may I ask, why mine?

Knives: Who was the one who borrowed my card last time and bough food so much that I can't get a new card until someone pays 10 000 dollars to Credit Card Company?? :-o

Legato: -_\\;; I deserve to die, master. It was me.

Knives: It was you, I know! STOP THAT MASTER THING ALLREADY EADY! IT'S STARTING TO GET IN MY NERVES GOD DAMMED! XO

Legato: Yes master. -_\\

Knives: God dammed, that I have humans -_-;;

Vash: O.o

Kuroneko: Nya! (He's a scary man your brother I mean.)

Vash: Yup it's still a deep mystery how we are twins. O.o

// O // O // O //

Legato: Master -_\\

Knives: 

Legato: Master. -_\\

Knives: 

Legato: Master. -_\\ ß Legato is annoyed.

Knives: Yes?

Legato: My left hand

Knives: I know. He's just behind us and hiding behind a newspaper. -_-;;

Vash: O.o;; Darn, you are good

Knives: Why are you following us, dear brother of mine? T_T

Vash: Um well it was the cats idea! *points nothing* Um, were did it go? Kuroneko-sama? Lord Black Cat? Were are you? Kitty, kitty

Kuroneko: *in another trash can* (I hate that name.) =T_T=

Vash: Oh well

Knives: Why are YOU following us?!

Vash: I'm sure you two are up to your no-good evil plans again. And it's my duty to protect these humans.

Random man: I hate my life! I wanna die and kill myself!

Random women: Oh, Pierre doesn't love me oh why why you life hate me? I will go home and hang myself!

Random teen: Everyone hates me I hate everyone I will become satanic and kill myself.

Legato: I deserve to die, like we all of us. -_\\

Knives: -_-;; Not again

Random person: *sings* I hate this world, this fucking world, this cruel world I wanna die

Random kid: I want a lollipop boo hoo!!

Vash: At least that kid didn't want to die. O.o.;; What's with people they only want to die. ;_; Suicide is bad.

Knives: So these are the persons you wanna save, Vash? o.ô

Vash: Um yes. O.o.;;

Knives: -_-;; Well, I give up. If everyone wants to die then I won't kill no one.

Vash + Legato: O.O. -_\\ ß Legato is surprised like Vash is.

Knives: Legato, give me your MasterCard. T_T

Legato: Yes master. *give it away*

Knives: Thank you. And now on, you won't call me master, there won't be anymore Gung-Ho Dumds, no killing just me and my hamster

Vash + Legato: Hamster?? O.O. O_\\

Knives: Yes. I will buy myself a hamster and move away from you all. I don't want to see you anymore and you won't see me anymore. Smell ya later. *walks away*

Vash: Just before he came to his sense, he left me alone with this freak next to me ;_; Boo-hoo!

Legato: O.\\

Vash: Legato?

Legato: O.\\

Vash: Legato?!

Legato: *brakes down in tears* MY MASTER HAS LEFT ME! I AHVENO REASONS TO LIVE! I WANNA KILL MYSELF!

Vash: O.o Legato crying?

Legato: ;_\\ *sniff* I - need - hot dogs *walks away like a zombie*

Vash: O.o

End of part 1


	2. Hamster & Master

**

DATING DISASTER// PART 02 // HAMSTER & MASTER

**

A/N: I don't own Trigun, but I own Hamstro (not the anime). And BTW, all the e-mails, sites and phone numbers they won't work they are just fakes. ^_^ Sorry 

// O // O // O //

Wolfwood: Boring. -_-_?

Vash: 

Wolfwood: Maybe hell has been frozen

Vash: I'm having a some odd vision now. O.o Have we had this conversation before?

Wolfwood: Yes. Yesterday. It has come even more boring since Knives left.

Vash: Tell me about it. Legato is so sad that he's has locked to his room and only eat hot dogs I will quite sad for him. He really seem to like been Knives' um slave? O.o

Wolfwood: You make it sound... so wrong

Vash: Gomen. -_-

Meryl: Make room for me! Is time for The Young And The Restless.

Wolfwood: No! Not again! I'm out! Bye!

Milly: Mr. Priest! ^_^

Wolfwood: (Oh crap.) -_-_?

Milly: *hug*

Wolfwood: I can't breath. .

Milly: ^__________^

Vash: O.o

Meryl: T_T *jealous* I want a boyfriend too

Vash: Don't look at me I don't um we are not together not good.

Meryl: T_T I wouldn't never dream about it.

Milly: But sempai. Last night you said that Vash is -

Meryl: You heard your own. Everyone! Be quiet! I'm watching my daily soap opera.

Milly: Wolfwood?

Wolfwood: +_+

Milly: ^___^ You look so cute.

Vash: Milly he's

Milly: So cute! *hugs even more*

Vash: Milly -

Meryl: SHUT UP! XO

Vash: *runs out* Bitch alert!!!

Meryl: ¬_¬ he will die later after the soap show.

Milly: Wolfwood! ^___^

Wolfwood: +_+

// O // O // O //

Knives: No! I said no! You can't do that! Go back! I said go back! T_T all right you can stay up with me, Hamster-boy. ^_^

Hamster: Eep.

Knives: But be quiet, I'm trying to read my 'War and Peace' book.

Hamster: Eep! ^_^ *starts eating the books pages*

Knives: No! Bad hamster! BAD! You can't eat my books! You eat that hamster food and some other stuff I bough you from the shop. Go to you gate and run in the wheel thing

Hamster: Eep?

Knives: Because, that is what hamsters do. Run in those funny wheel and look silly. That is you job after taking orders from me.

Hamster: Eep?

Knives: Because I said so! Gees, I need new minions. *gets and brinlliant idea* I know! Maybe there is someone in internet who wants to be slaved... there is eveythign in inter now days...

Hamster: =^__^= Eep.

Knives: Of course there is someone.

Hamster: Eep.

Knives: I'm Millions Knives! A genius plant! Why wouldn't some dork human want to join me and be my minion?

Hamster: =^__^= Eep. Eep.

Knives: You need seriously a name T_T 

Hamster: =^____^= 

Knives: Hmm... you look like that scary hamster from that really scary anime... what was it call... hmm... ...Hamtaro ! You will be Hamtaro now on!

Hamtaro : =^____^= Eep! *eats paper*

Knives: T_T Maybe it was too good name oh well

Hamtaro : =^__^= *eats more paper*

Knives: *surfs around the net* nothing...

:: 2 Hours Later ::

Knives: 

Hamtaro : -_- *sleeping*

Knives: 

Hamtaro : -_- *still sleeping*

Knives: Knives: Hey! What's this ??

" I'm non-human evil outlaw who lives in Planet Gunsmoke. I'm looking for a tough man by my side. I'm rude, but you can be too. I keep my promises and I'm very loyalty. I like action and I don't like to stay still. If you like to meet me, please send an e-mail what is outlaw@behindthegunfire.com ."

Knives: That sound good enough *types a mail*

" Hi. It seems there is finally someone else in Gunsmoke with evilness inside. I'm non-human too and rude too. Let's meet at The Longshot Bar, Friday at 9PM? i_am_genius@behindthegunfire.com ."

Knives: I hope he or she will answer soon -

Computer: You got mail.

Knives: That was fast. O.o

"Ok. See ya then, genius. - outlaw -"

Knives: *evil grin* Great.

Hamtaro: *still sleeping peacefully* -_-

// O // O // O //

Legato: ;_\\

Vash: Um, Legato

Legato: ;_\\

Vash: Legato

Legato: ;_\\

Vash: you should stop eating like that you will come sick, ya know

Legato: *eats hot dogs* ;_\\ I have only eat 219 hot dogs and this is my 220 hot dog. *sniff* Oh why is my life so cruel? This must be my hell... oh who can I live... it seems that I have to kill myself...

Vash: No. Don't do it. Suicide won't help you! But seriously, you shouldn't eat so much. I know that it must be hard for you, since Knives isn't your master anymore

Legato: You don't know who I feel!!!

Vash: Um, maybe I don't but still that's honestly bad eating hot dogs like a madman wait a second, you are a madman!

Legato: T_\\ *makes Vash stop breathing*

Vash: O.o. Eep! ..

Legato: You DON'T know who I feel so let me be alone and I won't kill you

Vash: Yes, sir. ..

Legato: Good *sets Vash free*

Vash: *is about to leave* Try the internet, there is lots of people like you, Legato.

Legato: GO AWAY!

Vash: *runs* O.O. HAI!

Legato: *thinks* people like me

:: Soon ::

Meryl: LEGATO! THAT'S MY LAPTOP!

Legato: So? T_\\

Meryl: You can take it, I'm doing my works with it!

Legato: You will get it back later I'm not like Vash who broke your last computer -_\\

Meryl: Last computer? *thinks a moment* THAT IDIOT HAVEN'T STILL PAY IT! VASH! *goes hunt Vash* YOU IDIOT BROOMHEAD!

Legato: He hee. -_\\ -- Legato is feeling evil. *goes back to his room*

// O // O // O //

Vash: Thanks, Wolfwood I was sure I was about to die ya know Meryl... T_T

Wolfwood: No problem. I needed myself a good excuse to get away from that house too.... Milly.

Vash: Oh. T_T Do you really want that badly to get rid of her?

Wolfwood: I'm a PRIEST! Free priest! Not a priest who wants to have 10 kids who all will love pudding. I like Milly, a lot, but not that much. -_-_? I'm poor too. How you thinki I can take care of 10 kids without money??

Vash: Okay Where are we going?

Wolfwood: I was thinking that we could go visit in bar later, but before that let's go to have a visit in Internet Café.

Vash: Why?

Wolfwood: Because we are trying to find a date!

Vash: We are? O.o.

Wolfwood: Yes. And I know a perfect place in net, where to find dates.

Vash: You do? o.O.

Wolfwood: -_-;; Yes, I do.

Vash: Cool. ^_^.

// O // O // O //

"I'm want to find a new master, who give me orders and is smart and evil and let's me call him master or lord. I like killing and blood. I hate humans and I have special powers. More information? Use this mail ; golden_eye@behindthegunfire.com"

Legato: ^_\\ That's a perfect message. I hope some will answer

Kuroneko: Nya!

Legato: -_\\ Go away... *makes Kuroneko jump out of the window*

Kuroneko: NNNYYYYYAAAA!!!!

Legato: I feel so much better now. -_\\ -- Happy, honestly.

Computer: You got mail.

Legato: For me? All ready? Wow. O.\\

"I would be a lovely master. I'm have the looks and I'm smart. Killing is a good think and I have my own kind of powers too. Could we meet at Black Cat Cafe at Friday, 8PM? karakurenai@behidnthegunfire.com."

Legato: Wow! Some on wants to met me. ^_\\

"Hello. I will be in Black Cat Café at 8PM. I'm tall, I have blue hair and I wear white coat. See ya then."

Legato: *starts thinking* What does karakurenai means? -_\\

// O // O // O //

Vash: Listen to this Wolfwood. Is this good enough? 'I'm handsome gunman, who is trying to with a pretty fairy princess to make his life more brighter. I'm tall, blond, good-looking, smart and a gentlemen. I'm very peaceful person and I don't like to hurt people. If you are interested, my e-mail is i_love_donuts@behindthegunfire.com.'

Wolfwood: O.o;;

Vash: Well?

Wolfwood: Yes, of course. -_-;; I'm sure there is some idiot who wants to met you

Vash: Are you going to leave a message there too?

Wolfwood: Nope. I found myself a girl all ready. I'm chatting with her right now.

Vash: What is she saying? Is she pretty?

Wolfwood: I don't know but she seems to be nice and I'm SURE that she isn't Milly.

Vash: Are you going to meet her?

Wolfwood: I'm asking

// Perfect Match's Chat Room // Men x Women //

Lonely Wolf : Um, could we meet some day?

Miss M: I guess we could. I'm really not interested in blind dates, but I guess I could brake that rule once.

Lonely Wolf : Great. ^_^ What do you say if we go to Gunsmoke Cinema to see some movie at Saturday?

Miss M: 8PM?

Lonely Wolf: It's deal.

Miss: Well, I must go now. I have work to do. But see ya then.

Lonely Wolf: See ya.

// End Of Chat //

Vash: Wow! I'm so jealous. You have a date.

Wolfwood: *smirks*

Vash: -_-. No one likes me -

Computer: You got mail.

Vash: I GOT MAIL! O.O WOO-HOO! ^_______^. I love the fast internet!

Wolfwood: -_-;, Calm down. This is a public place.

Vash: This girls wants to go movies with me at Saturday! O.O.

Wolfwood: Really?

Vash: Yeah. We could have a double blind date

Wolfwood: Yeah, so I can be shamed my eyes off because of you. No thanks.

Vash: T_T. That was mean.

Wolfwood: I know: *evil grin*

Vash: Whatever we see each other any way in the movies

Wolfwood: Yeah you better not to embarrass me. -_-

Vash: I won't if you don't do the same. T_T.

Wolfwood: Wha'eva. *walks out*

Vash: O_ô

A/N: No dates in this chapter either, but I promise... lots of chaos and dating in next chapter. *evil grin*

End Of Part 2


	3. The Longshot Bar

**

DATING DISASTER// PART 03 // THE LONGSHOT BAR

**

A/N: I own all the places and 1 character in this episode/chapter, but what comes to Trigun I do not own.

// O // O // O //

Vash: *sings* Donuts, donuts, donuts I love donuts and only donuts, donuts, donuts

Legato: *ahem* T_\\ Vash?

Vash: Yes? ^_^

Legato: Do I look evil?

Vash: O.o Evil?

Legato: Yes, evil. I have a appointment with my new master and I must look at my best. -_\\

Vash: Um O.o yes, you are looking _really_ evil. If you smile and look at very dangerous, maybe taht will do the trick.

Legato: Like this? *evil smile + evil eyes*

Vash: EEP! O.O. That one!!

Legato: Thank you. ^_\\ *leaves*

Vash: O.O.;;; That's was SCARY! Too scary!

// O // O // O //

Knives: and don't go anywhere and don't eat my books, Hamstro!

Hamtaro : Eep! =^_^=

Knives: T_T Stay in your gate what I bough you! Remember that? I don't want to search you all day long like yesterday!

Hamtaro : Eep! =^_^=

Knives: Bye, Hamstro! 

Hamtaro : Eep! Eep! =^_^=

Knives: *leaves*

Hamtaro : *opens the gate door and runs to eat Knives' bookshelf* (A/N: My hamster did this!) EEEEPPP!! =^____^= *eats paper*

// O // O // O //

Legato: Why it did have to rain today? -_\\ -- Not happy!

:: Soon ::

Legato: -_\\ Black Cat Café *looks at the dark little shop* My new master seems to have style. -_\\ --Happy! *enters the café* O.\\ *seems someone who he wouldn't like to see*

Crimsonnail: Legato?

Legato: Elendira? O.\\ W-w-why... are YOU here?

Crimsonnail: I would like to ask the same from you. T_T

Legato: Um O.\\ stopping by 

Crimsonnail: Okay. Waitress! New coffee.

Hoppered: I'm not waitress!

Crimsonnail: But you work here

Hoppered: Shut up! I need money since there isn't no need for Gung-Ho Guns anymore.

Legato: O.\\

Crimsonnail: Legato. If you see Knives. Say hi to him from me. ^_^

Legato: NEVER! T_\\

Crimsonnail: How stubborn man you are *looks at the clock* Oh my. My date is late.

Legato: O_\\ D-D-DATE? Uh oh *thinkis* look at the time!! I must go back home need cheese see ya! *runs*

Crimsonnail: Legato is sure busy, even if Knives isn't ordering him anymore. T_T Where's my coffee?!

Hoppered: COMING GOD DAMMED!

:: Outside of the bar ::

Legato: Karakurenai crimson O.\\ thank God, he her didn't notice I was his err.. her date

* CRASH *

Legato: HEY! LOOK WHERE ARE YOU GOING MORON! _\\

Dominique: Legato? O.O

Legato: Dominique?

Dom: Why are you here?

Legato: Um walking? O.\\;;

Dom: T_T Oh well, okay, but I must go now. I have blind dates now and I'm all ready late.

Legato: Uh.. okay o.\\ bye.

Dom: Bye. *gone*

Legato: Demon's Eye ¬_\\ I guess I better leave this place or Elendira goes after me. *gets a scary vision* What will everyone say, if I will come back all ready?? They wills tart thinking I'm a loser, who's, dates run away people will think I'm Vash!! O.\\ I don't wanna be loser! I can't be! I'm supports to be a human scum!! Not a LOSER!

Dom: *back* Hi Legato! ^_^

Legato: *evil grin* (Who I will ever thank my ex-master for these powers?) Hello Dominique? ^_\\

Dom: I change my mind. Will you go out with me? I know I nice bar near. ^_^

Legato: Sure. Let's go then. (Weak minded trash. Bwhuhahahaa! I'm will not look a loser! I have a date! Bwhuhahahaa!)

Dom: You look happy, Legato. ^_^

Legato: I'm not happy. -_\\ I'm human trash, who don't deserve to live.

Dom: You should stop that. Knives isn't your master anymore.

Legato: *sniff* O.\\ I miss my master.

Dom: Just say Knives. He's no ones master anymore. So stop it.

Legato: He's master! .\\ Maybe not mine, but I'm sure he's someone's master!

Dom: Whatever. -_-;;

// O // O // O //

Knives: I wonder what is that no-gof human trash Legato doing? Maybe I should call him NO! That would only show that I'm a softhead! I must be tough, even if am without my minions! No one can stop me! *looks at his watch* Gees, that non-human bastard is late! I hate waiting!

:: Car drives in front to Knives - A women comes out of the car ::

Women: Hello. You must be my date KNIVES? O.O

Knives: O.O YOU?? Don't tell that you were the one who

Women: Yes. It was me. I'm that non-human date of yours tonight o.o

Knives: Ah shit -_-;; why, why it had to be you, Little Dee?

Dee: I dunno. But I hope you will enjoy at least a glass with me, since we both are here. We are friends, right? ^_^

Knives: Friends? Right--- ¬_¬

Dee: Don't give me that look, jerk! You were the one who answered my message!!

Knives: But you were the one who put the message in the net, idiot! XO This is all your fault!

Dee: AH shut up. T_T

Knives: No, you shut up metal head!!

Dee: Well, then you are a freak!!

Knives: What did you call me?!

Dee: FREAK!

Knives: Why you you.. NO-GOOD METAL HEAD OF NOTHINGNESS!

Dee: O.o 

Knives: o.O What?

Dee: Hahaahahahaa!! You haven't change a bit, thank God! ^_^

Knives: O.o Um and you well you are still Dee the metal head idiot o.O

Dee: Could we go now? I don't like to get my body rusty.

Knives: Yes, sure. O.o (Why in the Earth her?!)

(A/N: If you haven't read Behind The Gunfire / My Secrets / Love, Peace & World Domination fictions by me, then I will shortly tell who Little Dee is. Dee is 'friend' of Knives (and Vash too), who is a old robot women made in Earth, a very dangerous outlaw who loves Knives. She calls Knives a jerk and Knives calls her an idiot and they will usually have after that stupid long fight very dangerous duo.)

// O // O // O //

Legato: -_\\

Dom: Is everything all right, Legato? Should I order a drink for you?

Legato: No thanks. I just want to sit here and die slowly and painful like master wanted all humans to do.

Dom: *slap* GET A GRIP, LEGATO! You are still the leader of Gung-Ho Guns! You can't die because you have die all ready once!

Legato: -_\\ -- PISSED OFF!

Dom: O.O Oops. Maybe I should have slap you I'm very, very, very sorry Legato-sama O.O I beg you.. don't kill me!! Please! *begs* . 

Legato: *is about to crush Dominique* -_\\

Grey The Ninelives as bartender: ^____^

Legato: A free drink? For me? Oh thank you, Grey. *calms down*

Dom: O.O alive?

Legato: -_\\ I'm not in the mood to kill By the way, Gaine has a fine bar here.

Dom: Um, yes O.o who would though that silent guy opens a bar someday

Legato: -_\\

2 Random Persons: *enters the bar*

Legato: O.\\

Dom: O.o Oh no

Legato: O.\\

Dom: Legato?

Legato: O.\\

Dom: Legato. Are you okay? Legato-sama?

Legato: O.\\

Dee: then I blow up the whole bank, but guess what.

Knives: What?

Dee: I had blow the whole money to sky with the bank too. ^_^ I used too much dynamite. ^_^

Knives: ^_^

Legato: Master ;_\\

Dom: Who is that women?

Legato: How dare the human scum touches my master! T_\\ --READY TO KILL!!

Dom: Shh! Shut up you know what happens if you interrupt Knives and he seems to enjoy that women's company

Legato:* tries to use mind control* O.\\

Dom: What now, Legato?

Legato: She's lost technology a high intelligent robot. O.\\ Have my master got himself a new minion? Have he forget all ready me? His most loyalty minion? ;_\\

Dom: -_-;; Maybe, maybe not

// O // O // O //

Knives: (Why Legato is here? And with Dominique? WHY? I need to know!) ¬_¬

Dee: Why you look at the women? T_T You have a women all ready next to you.

Knives: No no, it's not like that those to.. over there are my ex-minions

Dee: I see they look like real freaks. Maybe we should kill them? ^_^

Knives: NO!

Dee: O.o Huh?

Knives: O.o;; I will.. kill them later by myself they are in the end, MY ex-minions.

Dee: Oh. Okay. ^_^ More vodka for me!!

Gaine: -_- *brings more vodka*

Knives: T_T You.

Gaine: 

Dee: ??

Gaine: *leaves*

Dee: What the fuck?

Knives: He's an ex-minion of mine too -_-

Dee: Oh. You sure have pick up some odd freaks to your gang, Knivesu-babe. ^_^

Knives: DON'T YOU DARE CALL ME THAT!

Dee: I dare. ^_^ Knivesu-babe.

Knives: T_T;; Now I really remember why I left since we last time met I couldn't stand that name

Dee: Um.. if I stop calling you that would. You.. *blushes* take over the world with me once again?

Knives: T_T

Dee: Please?

Knives: T_T

Dee: Pretty please?

Knives: T_T;;

Dee: I tell everyone that we are getting married if you wont' take me back! :-O

Knives: You won't dare! O.O

Dee: You know me, better that anyone else I dare much more that even you dare to do if that kiss you gave me once won't been count n_n

Knives: O.o What kiss?

Dee: You don't remember?? X,O YOU ARE SO CRUEL!

Knives: WHAT THE - You are crying.??

Dee: BOO HOO! X,O

Knives: O.o Stop it! RIGHT NOW!

Dee: I won't stop if you don't take over the world with me!! X,O

Knives: O.o okay! Okay! Just stop that Vash act! NOW!

Dee: ^_^ Knivesu-babe! *hug*

Knives: *redness* O.O now

Legato: ;_\\ *eats his glass* How that women dares to touch *sniff* my master?

Dom: O.o Um, Legato? That isn't healthy anymore eating glass is too much.... I think we should go now I know a good hot dog place near ^.^;;

Legato: ;_\\ *leaves* my master *sniff*

Dom: Umsee ya later, Gray and Gaine *follows Legato* -_-;;

Grey: ^_________^

Gaine: T_T

// O // O // O //

Dee: I had lots of fun, tonight. ^_^ Thanks you.

Knives: Um you are welcome? O.o

Dee: Well um are you going to invite me inside?

Knives: What? Why? Don't you have a place to stay? Go to a hotel. T_T

Dee: T_T Knives 

Knives: Yes?

Dee: You are even stupider than your brother *jumps in her car* A normal guy would have invite me in, but NO! YOu ahve to be a non-normal IDIOT! *drives away*

Knives: o.ô What's with her? Oh well... I don't care... *goes inside* Hamtaro , I'm ho - O.O

Hamtaro : +_+

Knives: What the fuck?! O.o You have eat all my books?! 

Hamtaro : Eep +_+

Knives: O.o

(A/N: Don't worry folks. Hamtaro is NOT dead... YET. *evil grin*)

TO BE CONTINUED


	4. She's Too Powerful

**Dating Disaster // Part 04 // She's Too Powerful**

A/N: *sings* I own Dee, I own Dee, D, Little Dee and Hamtaro… not in the pervert way of course. O.o I don't own Trigun and maybe the world is much better that way. ^.^

// O // O // O //

:: Friday 11PM :: 

Zazie: *standing alone in the rain and looking so kawaii sad that some fangirls would go crazy and run hug him* ;_; My date never came… she said she will come surely… or maybe something happened to her…. I'm so alone… *sniff* 

???: Hey! What are you doing here kid? Should you go home? You get clod soon… 

Zazie: I'm not a kid, I'm a – O.O 

???: Yes…? O.ô 

Zazie: O.O 

???: WHAT? 

Zazie: *.* 

???: You are starting to scare me kid. 

Zazie: Would you go out with me? *.* 

???: WHAT? O.o 

(A/N: Hmm, weren't Dominique going on a date before Legato changed her mind with his mind powers? ^_~ Could it be that Zazie… I NEVER TELL! !!! BWHUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHHAHAHAAA!! Suffer you human scums! ) 

// O // O // O //

:: Saturday Before 8PM :: 

Vash: I'm so nervous! 

Wolfwood: Calm down. I'm sure she is a idiot like you… I mean, nice like you. 

Vash: ¬.¬. I'm not stupid, ya know. 

Wolfwood: Oh really? 

Vash: Oh really. 

Wolfwood: Well, I don't see nothing that is smart in you. -_-_? 

Vash: o.o WHY EVERYONE IS SO MEAN TO ME?! X,O 

Wolfwood: Oh shut up! *smack* 

Vash: +_+ Birdies… stars… flowers… Knives??? 

Wolfwood: Now he really went crazy! O.o_? 

Vash: No! O.O That IS Knives… with LITTLE DEE! 

Wolfwood: WHAT?! *almost swallows his cigarette* . *couchcouchcouch* 

Vash: O.O 

Wolfwood: O.O 

:: Across The Street::: 

Dee: ^_^ Oh Knivesu… 

Knives: -_-;; 

Dee: Isn't it so lovely night, Knivesu-babe? ^.^ 

Knives: Yeah, really lovely… -_-;;; 

Dee: I would like to be like this forever. ^.^ 

Knives: You mean, hang in my like your life depends on it? T_T;;;; 

Dee: Knives. Don't be just a jackass. You know too well, that this wouldn't happened if you would have IT? (A/N: See Love, Peace & World Domination – Chapter 09 !!) 

Knives: -__-;; It was a bad MISTAKE! And I REALLY regret it. 

Dee: Stop that! 

Knives: Stop what?! :-O 

Dee: THAT! 

Knives: What that?! 

Dee: You are so mean! Don't say that didn't mean nothing to you! 

Knives: It DIDN'T mean nothing to me! Just leave me now! 

Dee: ;_; I can't! I love you, Knives! 

Knives: -_-;; Gees… that's great, why don't you just kill me right away? 

Dee: KNIVES! :-o Stop that all ready! I won't give up that easily! I will be your girlfriend whatever you say! 

Knives: -_-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; {Why can't this land just swallow me?} 

Dee: Oh Knivesu-babe. ^_^ *hang in Knives* 

Knives: {If there's a God, save me now!} -__-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; 

(A/N: I always put my fiction-Knives in situations, where he wouldn't never belong. I'm so evil. ^.^) 

:: Back To Front Of The Gundrive Cinema :: 

Vash: o.O Um… could it be that… 

Wolfwood: ...Knives and Dee… 

Vash + Wolfwood: TOGETHER? O.o_? o.O. 

Vash: *looks at Wolfwood* 

Wolfwood: *looks at Vash* 

Vash + Wolfwood: NEVER! ;;^.^_? ;;^.^. 

Wolfwood: Knives… Dee… never… 

Vash: Yeah, I know what you mean… they are just too… 

Wolfwood: Odd? O.o_? 

Vash: Um, I was thinking more of… perfect. -_-;; 

Wolfwood: What to do you mean? Perfect? DO you mean they are TOO perfect couple? What a hell is that? 

Vash: You haven't seen them together before, have you? Well I have and… well… I'm very surprised that the both are still alive… and I know that Dee ahs strong feelings for Knives – 

Voice: What are you 2 doing here? 

Wolfwood: Meryl? 

Meryl: Yes, me. Why are you here?! YOU SHOULDN'T BE HERE! 

Vash: Well, miss Insurance girl, we have a date. NO! NO! NOT together! We are waiting our dates. ^.^;; 

Meryl: Don't tell me you 2 are going to movies too? O.o To see Bruce Almighty?? 

Wolfwood: Um, yes. 

Vash: Wait a minute… could it be that Meryl is here, because she's my date???? O.o 

Wolfwood: Or mine date??? 

Meryl: WHAT?? NEVER!! You 2 wouldn't never end finding dates from the internet… 

Vash: We FOUND our dates from internet. 

Meryl: O.o 

Wolfwood: O.o 

Vash: O.o. 

Meryl: I have a bad feeling about this… o.O 

Wolfwood: You are not the only one… 

??: Vash! 

Vash: O.O. R-r-e-e-m??? 

Rem: Vash. What are you doing here? 

Vash: Um… {If there is God, let this be it!} …I'm… waiting my date to come… we are… going… to movies. 

Wolfwood: O.o_? 

Meryl: O.o 

Rem: That's wonderful! Then I must be your date. ^_^ 

Meryl: O.O 

Wolfwood: o.o That means… Meryl… 

Meryl: o.o This is… to odd... 

Vash: {WOOOOOOO-HOOOOOOOOOO!!} ^_______________________________^ Shall we go get our tickets, Rem? 

Rem: Sure. ^_^ 

Vash: I can buy your ticket too. 

Rem: You have become a fine gentlemen, Vash. 

Vash: Thanks to you, Rem. n_n 

Rem: *blush* ^_^ 

Wolfwood: O.o_??? 

Meryl: O.o Um… 

Wolfwood: Eer… 

Meryl: Do you… still want to go… the movies…. you know… as a friend… 

Wolfwood: Sure. In a date with you… would have been… um… 

Meryl: Odd? 

Wolfwood: I was thinking more of… embarrassing. 

Meryl: Hey! 

Wolfwood: Oops. ^.^;; Sorry. 

Meryl: ¬_¬ Just let's go, before I will slap you. 

Wolfwood: 'k. *goes to the ticket thingy* 2 tickets to Bruce – O.O YOU? 

Leonof The Puppetmaster: Bruce Almighty? 

Wolfwood: Um… O.O;; …yes…? 

Leonof: That would be 8.20 dollars. T_T 

Wolfwood: Um… here… O.O Is Legato up to something? 

Leonof: What do you mean? 

Wolfwood: Something evil… like taking over the world or just wants to scare people to dead. 

Leonof: No. I'm need a job to make money. There's no need for Gung-Ho Guns anymore. 

Wolfwood: Okay… O.o …right… *leaves* What else? Monev starts a ballet career? 

Meryl: T_T+ 

Wolfwood: What's wrong? 

Meryl: They! ¬_¬ 

Wolfwood: Oh Vash and Rem. They look really happy together. I'm really surprised that Vash even had a date… 

Meryl: That's so wrong! 

Wolfwood: Huh? 

Meryl: So wrong… *goes in the cinema* …wrong… -_-+ 

Wolfwood: What next? Knives and Dee getting married? -_-;; That would be end of the world… 

// O // O // O //

Knives: {SOMEONE SAVE ME!} ;_; 

Dee: Oh Knives! It would be so wonderful! You and me… together forever! 

Knives: ;_; {KILL ME!} 

Dee: But first… I should move to your place, since I don't have a place to go. I sleep in my car… Knivesu-darling? 

Knives: No. You can't move to my place! 

Dee: Oh yes. 

Knives: No. 

Dee: I don't believe you. You love me so much that you can't stand that much love so you don't want me to live in your house. But don't worry… we figure something so I can live in your place… and we can be together… forever! *hugs* n_n 

Knives: . …can't…breath… 

Dee: Oh Knivesu-babe-darling-honey! 

Knives: …too… powerful… +_+ 

Dee: Knivesu… Knives… is something wrong? Honey? 

Knives: +_+ 

(A/N: I'm so mean! X,O Oh Knives, what I have done to you?! Boo hoowhuahahhahahahaahhaahaa!! :-D) 

// O // O // O //

Meryl: T_T+ 

Wolfwood: -_-;; 

Meryl: T_T Why? 

Wolfwood: I'm the wrong person to answer that. 

Meryl: T_T Vash …and Rem… 

Wolfwood: Why don't you just admit that you are… {Do you wanna live?} …um nothing… -_-;; 

Meryl: T_T Why?! 

Wolfwood: Try to enjoy the movie at least and don't stare them. ¬_¬ 

Meryl: HOW CAN I ENJOY A MOVIE IF I SEE THAT IDIOT BROOMHEAD ALL OVER REM?! XO 

Everyone: SHHH!! 

Meryl: O.o;; Oops… sorry… *wishes to be invisible* 

Wolfwood: …I'm not here… -_-;; 

:: Couple Seats Ahead :: 

Vash: ^___^ 

Rem: This is really good movie. 

Vash: Um, yes. {What movie?} n_n 

Meryl: I CAN'T STADN THIS! *marches out of the cinema* 

Wolfwood: *follows* -_-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; 

Rem: What with her? 

Vash: She maybe didn't like the movie. ^_^ 

Rem: Maybe. But I like. 

Vash: I like it very much too. n_n {I'm in heaven…} 

// O // O // O //

:: Black Cat Café :: 

Wolfwood: *sits alone* -_-;; What a day… …well, at least I'm still free and Milly isn't around. 

Milly: Mr. Priest! 

Wolfwood: O.o;; Crap. I spoke too soon. 

Milly: Oh Wolfwood! *hugs* 

Wolfwood: O.o 

Milly: Why are you here? 

Wolfwood: I was about to ask the same. O.ô 

Milly: I got a part time job from here, since the last waitress quit. 

Wolfwood: I see. T_T_? 

Milly: No smoking here, hun. ^___^ 

Wolfwood: -__-;;; 

Dee: *enters the café* Oh, I'm so sorry, darling… ^.^;; 

Knives: x_x 

Dee: I call a taxi and then let's go home… okay? 

Knives: … x_x … 

Wolfwood: Holy crap! *hides behind a newspaper* I'm not here. 

Milly: I will go serve the costumers. I will be back soon. ^__^ 

Wolfwood: NO! 

Milly: ?? 

Wolfwood: No… {Knives would kill her!} …um… I don't wanna be alone. ^.^;; Let's have a chat about… out future …kids. -_-;; 

Milly: Oh Wolfwood! *sits down right away* If we get a boy we should call him Dokonokuminomonjawaresumakinishiteshizumetarokakora and if it's a girl then she will be – 

Wolfwood: Hey, what's the big idea? My middle name is not going to be my child's name! Do you even know what it means? 

Milly: No, but is sounds funny. ^_^ 

Wolfwood: I give up… -_-;; 

// O // O // O //

Dee: Is this your home, Knivesu? 

Knives: Yes. T_T 

Dee: It's wonderful. ^_^ 

Voice: Eep. 

Knives: O.o 

Dee: What was that? 

Knives: Nothing! O.o 

Voice: Eep. 

Dee: There it's again! What is? 

Knives: I dunno. O.O {I will kill you later, you stupid hamster!} 

Dee: *goes to Knives office* What's this? 

Knives: O.o I'm doomed. 

Dee: … 

Hamtaro: Eep. =^_^= 

Dee: … T_T …Knives, there's a hamster in your office room. 

Knives: Oh really? You see things. ^.^;; 

Dee: *starts to leave* 

Knives: Huh? You are… leaving? O.o 

Dee: I can't stay a place where is something that, that… cute… A hamster… NEVER! I will never come back if you don't get rid of that… that… cuteness… bye. 

Knives: O.o She… left? HOORAY! 

Hamtaro: Eep! =^_^= *eats toilet paper* 

Knives: Thank you stupid Hamtaro! I love you! XD 

Hamtaro: Eep!! =o_o= 

Knives: T_T No, not really… I still hate you… here *gives a whole book* Eat it. 

Hamtaro: Eep! Epee! =^_^= *eats the book's pages* 

Knives: ^_^ Freedom! 

End Of Part 4 


	5. HELP!

**

DATING DISASTER// PART 05 // HELP!

**

"My sister has a hamster...it's the stupidest thing. We put it in the little rolly ball and it bumps into furniture and doesn't have the sense to go around it...It also bit me about ten times. I keep dropping it on the floor but it won't die."  
- knives-sama the Reviewer from FF-NET

"Dear knives-sama (Millions Knives-sama? Is that You, my master?)  
I had the same problem with my hamster (= Iippo Wilberi Wineetto Blah 2nd) - what is BTW dead now (I didn't kill it! It was old!) -_- ...I use to put it into rolly ball too and it scared my dog - and Raus should be a royalty hunter dog or something... -_-;; Hamsters are just too powerful, but don't worry, they won't live long. Maybe 2 years only. But while you wait that, try to spin it around in the rolly ball ot let it eat your homeworks. ^.^ It's quite fun and usually sometimes. My teacher believed me when I said my hasmter east my homework."  
- PopMonkey7 & The ghost hamster Iippo

A/N: BTW I don't own Trigun! Cheers! ^_^

// O // O // O //

Wolfwood: This is really serious situation. -_-_?

Meryl: Hmm...

Wolfwood: I mean, REALLY serious.

Meryl: Hmm....

Wolfwood: Really deadly serious.

Meryl: Hmm...

Wolfwood: Meryl?

Meryl: Aha.

Wolfwood: Never mind. -_-;;

Meryl: Hmm...

Wolfwood: 

Meryl: Yup.

Wolfwood: O.o

Meryl: Uh

Wolfwood: T_T Are you brain-dead or something?

Meryl: Yup.

Wolfwood: Should we give a cookie to E.G. Mine?

Meryl: Hmm...

Wolfwood: -_-;; You are not listening

Meryl: Hmm...

Wolfwood: Well are you jealous to Vash?

Meryl: Hmm... yes, whatever... O.O NO! NEVER! I'M NOT JELOUS TO VASH!

Wolfwood: Hey! You did listen to me! XD

Meryl: _ I don't wish you to die again.

Wolfwood: Me either. ^_^

Meryl: -_-;;

Wolfwood: Should we take Legato to psychiatry?

Meryl: Um errI dunno maybe

Wolfwood: I mean he's not eating and speaking I think he has lost his mind

Meryl: Why do you care? He's a evil man!

Wolfwood: Hey what do you except from priest who died because he started to think Vash's way??

Legato: *enters*

Meryl: Um

Legato: ;_\\ -- Zombie-Legato

Wolfwood: O.o

Legato: *leaves*

Meryl: Maybe we should call to psychiatry right away! That's too scary. He's NOT eating!

Phone: Ring! Ring!

Wolfwood: O.o They were fast *pick up the phone-* Hallo? O.O Meryl? Yes Um.. okay *turns to Meryl* Um, someone from Perfect Match wants to talk to you O.o ??

Meryl: O.O Um.. err say to them that I will change room and will be in phone soon! *runs upstairs*

Wolfwood: Um, okay. *back to phone* Wait just a minute she will be on the line soon *is about to hang up the phone* Wait a second *evil grin* {This I MUST hear!}

// O // O // O //

Knives: O.O

Hamtaro: ^_^ Eep!

Dee: *bangs the door* KNIVES! OPEN THE DOOR!

Knives: O.O;; I I can't! I don't wanna

Dee: OPEN THIS DOOR, MILLIONS ENMA KNIVES!

Knives: That's not my full name it's -

Hamtaro: =^_^= Eep! *eats Knives' 'Millions Ways To Take Over The World' book written by P. Monkey*

Knives: You idiot! That's MY book! This is yours! *gives 'This Book Don't Have No Name' book written by N. Amless*

Hamtaro: =^_^= EEP! *eats the both books*

Knives: O.o

Dee: *bangs even more the door* MILLIONS ENMA KNIVES!

Knives: THAT'S NOT MY NAME! XO 

Dee: KNIVES!!!!!!!!!!!! *Bang! Bang*

Knives: --- That's it! I had enough! T_T

Dee: KNIVES! OPEN THE DOOR -

Knives: *opens the door* WHAT? T_T

Dee: O.O;; Um

Knives: I don't have all day. I'm a busy Plant you know. T_T

Dee: Um may I come in first?

Knives: No! T_T

Dee: 'k. Um err

Knives: Yes? -_-;;

Dee: Can you forgive me?

Knives: Forgive? O.o

Dee: Yes. I'm really sorry what I have done and I want to you to know that um I guess that was it I'm sorry.

Knives: O.o Um are you going to leave me alone now?

Dee: Yes, if that's your wish. -_-

Knives: Um.. 'k. That's just fine with me! XD Go! Get lost - O.O

Dee: ;_; You are so. mean *is about to leave but -*

Knives: *hugs Dee* -_-;; {I'm going to regret this.}

Dee: O.o *blushes*

:: Across The Street ::

Legato: ;_\\ 

Kuroneko: *walks and leaves* Nya!

Knives: -_-;; {I won't let Legato see me without a new minion!! NEVER!! He must know that everyone else can always replace him.}

Legato: ;_\\ *follows Kuroneko* I'm so lonely angst bishounen now oh this sorrow.

Kuroneko: Nya! Nya!

Fangirls: Hi Legato! ^____^

Legato: T_\\ ??

Fangirls: We are from official Angst Bishounen Clompers Club. May we clomp you? ^____^

Legato: T_\\ Go away! I'm want to be alone or do I have to use my mind powers?

Fangirls: *runs away* EEP! HE'S GOING TO KILL US!! RUN FOR YOU LIVES!!

Legato: -.\\

Fangirls: *far away* YOU FIND US IN PERFECT MATCH -

Legato: GOT TO HELL! *throws the skull from his left arm* AND LEAVE ME ALONE! .\\

Fangirls: WE GOT LEGATO'S SKULL! KAWAII! XD

Legato: O.\\

Fangirls: *fights over the skull* IT'S MINE!

Legato: They need a good lesson. -_\\ *mind controls*

Fangirls: *starts tap-dancing* OH NO! SOMEONE HELP US! WE ARE TAP-DANCING!

Legato: *ignores* -_-;; so simple minded and useless I'm So Alone! ;_\\

Kuroneko: Nya?! = O.o =

// O // O // O //

Knives: I'm So Alone! ;_;

Dee: What are you talking about, Knivesu-darling? ^_^ You got me by our side - FOREVER!

Knives: _ Why can't you be evil and insane outlaw again?  
  
Dee: NEVER! I don't wanna kill anymore without purpose! Now own I will kill only people you say that needs to be killed.

Knives: Okay. Hang yourself and leave me alone. T_T

Dee: T_T Knivesu don't take this so hard I mean, come on. I know you have feelings for me

Knives: NEVER! I don't have feelings for no one!

Vash: Yo, bro! ^_^.

Knives: O.O

Vash: Wazzap? ^_^

Rem: Hello, Knives. Nice to see you again. n_n

Knives: O.O YOU!

Rem: Yes, Knives? ^_^

Knives: A-ali-li-v-ve ?? O.O

Dee: O.o

Rem: Well, if the Gung-Ho Guns are alive, then why I wouldn't be alive? ^_^

Vash: ^__^. *hearts everywhere*

Dee: ¬_¬

Knives: But, but O.O I killed you! YOU SHOULDN'T BE ALIVE!

Vash: Knives. :O That is no way to talk to Rem. Rem took care of both when we were little. Without her, we wouldn't be here, Knives. Show some respect to her. At least ones.

Knives: Respect? - Kiss my ass! T_T Dee... let's go I know a good place near were we can be alone bye brother and worthless human scum.

Dee: Whatever you want dear Knivesu-babe. ^_^

Knives: -__-;;;;

Vash: Rem isn't a human scum!! No human isn't!! ..

Rem: Vash dear don't push yourself too much.

Vash: But Rem I_I.

Rem: Knives like everyone else has different ways of thinking and I'm sure he will come to his sense soon. ^_^ Look at him. ^_^ He got a girlfriend. No one - Oh look! A red flower!

Vash: O.o

Rem: Oh, I just love red flowers. ^_^ Vash! Buy me that flower! T_T

Vash: o.O Huh? Um, sure, okay. ^_^ Anything you wanna.

// O // O // O //

:: Park ::

Meryl: T_T My date is late I could be at home watching Young And The Restless now. -_- hmm, Milly is sure a tough one I hope Wolfwood is all right

:: A Creepy Flashback ::

Meryl: *comes downstairs* ^_^

Wolfwood: You got a date! O.O

Meryl: Huh? Who did you know?! O.o

Wolfwood: Err, you are smiling! ^.^;;

Meryl: Don't say that you spy me on the phone? _

Wolfwood: No! I would never do that! ^_^;;;;

Meryl: You better not if you wish to live

Door: *opens*

Wolfwood: **O.O**

Milly: *carries tens of bags* Wolfwood! I'm home! ^_^ I was shopping stuff to our baby boy.

Meryl: Baby? Boy? O.o ??

Wolfwood: But you are not even pregnant yet! T_T And you don't know if the baby will be boy or a girl.

Milly: It's your job to get us baby boy. Ask from God to give us a boy. ^_^

Wolfwood: T_T;;

Meryl: -__-;;

Wolfwood: Milly

Meryl: God doesn't 'work' like that that he will give us what we want.

Milly: But Wolfwood is a priest!

Wolfwood: What that does have to do with this? O.o

Milly: I'm sure God will listen to you. ^_^

Wolfwood: -_-;; I'm sure he will listen but -

Milly: We are getting a baby boy! We having a baby boy! Hurrah! Hurrah! ^____^

Wolfwood: O.o But, but, BUT!

Milly: Lalalalalallaaa *goes upstairs*

Wolfwood: But BUT! ;_;

:: End Of Creepy Flashback ::

Meryl: I feel quite sorry for him Milly sure can be annoying sometimes. -_-;;

???: What are YOU doing here?

Meryl: O.O YOU?

???: Yes me. Midvalley. T_T

Meryl: Well, it's not your business, Hornfreak.

Midvalley: Well, if you are not my date then it's not my business. T_T

Meryl: O.o {No! Not again! Damn that Perfect Match! I will sue them!}

Midvalley: Hey isn't that Zazie and -

Vash: Hello Meryl! ^_^

Meryl T_T

Rem: Hi Meryl. I'm Rem. Nice to meet you. ^_^

Meryl: I know that you are Rem. Vash had told that so many times. T_T

Vash: May I ask what are you doing here with Hornfreak? O.o

Meryl: O.O

Midvalley: I was just passing by. I would never go on a date with her! _

Meryl: _ Idiot.

Midvalley: Whatever. I better go now with my date. I'm all ready late. See ya.

Meryl: T_T That shirt is terrible.

Vash: I agree.

Rem: How can someone wear that kind of shirt? It's horrible. T_T

Vash: O.o Rem?

Rem: Let's go Vash. I want to buy some clothes. *drags Vash away*

Vash: Um, err, bye Meryl... o.O Wait! Rem!

Meryl: T_T That's Rem Saverem, Vash's deepest love?

Kuroneko: Nya!

Legato: ;_\\

Meryl: O.o Um I can see the last part of Young And The Restless, if I hurry. *leaves*

Legato: *sniff* ;_\\

  



	6. The Mystery Of Kuroneko

**DATING DISASTER// PART 06 // THE MYSTERY OF KURONEKO**

A/N: I own Trigun! BWHUHAHAHHAHAAHAHAA *breath* HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA! XD NOT AT ALL! BWHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH - - - +_+ - - - *dies and reborn* ^__^ BTW, beware to be surprised. XD

// O // O // O //

Legato: ;_\\  
  
Kuroneko: -_- Nya

Knives: T_T What are you doing here?

Dee: ^_^

Legato: Master! O.\\

Knives: I'm NOT your master! T_T

Legato: I'm very sorry ma sir Mr. Knives.

Knives: -_-;;

Dee: Hey, you are that guy from the bar. You were with that bitchy looking girl. That ex-minion guy.

Legato: -_\\

Knives: T_T Don't you have anything better do than sit in here and talk to that stupid cat?

Legato: N-n-no. ;_\\

Knives: -____-;; Dee let's go. This is too depressive scene.

Dee: Sure. Let's go. Maybe we should that deprive blue guy? ^_^

Knives: Maybe later. -_-

Dee: Um, okay. ^_^

Legato: O_\\ That evil women ahs change my master he don't even want to kill anymore. I have do save my master!

Kuroneko: Nya!

Legato: Why are you following me? Get lost! I won't buy you food! *throws the cat away*

Kuroneko: *flies* NNNNNNYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Legato: ^_\\ I feel better all ready. Where did they went? I must kill that robot-women! *hides in a bush*

Knives: *!"%?£#!"`^*½!£@ß*-.§?{& !!! XO

Dee: Wow, Knives. How you do that? O.O

Knives: _ It wasn't me. That stupid red haired nerd in the front of the computer singing loudly JPOP. -_- She censored my line and I her favorite character! IS THIS HOW YOU TREAT ME BAKA+!

Author: ^_^ Gomen Knivesu. I'm just out of ideas now and that was fun at least I think

Knives: T_T I hate you.

Dee: Hi Pop Monkey!! XD

Author: Hi Dee. ^_^ Knives, listen up you will stick around with Dee and that's it! If you don't do what I say, I will make you suffer eternal!

Knives: O.ô I'm not scare of you, baka! HEY, STOP THAT!

Authors* pokes Knives* Take that!

Dee: That and sux!

Author: I agree! *pokes Knives bit more* I think you had your punishment or do you want me to get my bishounen-whip?

Knives: O.O NO! NOT THAT!

Author: than behave and act like a lover or something like that Dee, take care of Knivesu-babe-sama. ^_^

Dee: I will. ^_^ Bye!

Author: Bye! *gone with the wind*

Knives: O.O So, she was the one who gave me that name

Dee: Yes. Dear, shall we go now or will I have to get her back with her whip? ^_^

Knives: O.O Yes, ma'am.

Dee: *giggles* Oh Knivesu-darling... ^.^

Knives: -_-;;; {I'm doomed!}

Legato: O.\\

Dee + Knives: *leaves hand by hand*

Legato: O.\\ I have to save my master!

Kuroneko: NYA! =.= *attacks* 

Legato: AH! HELP ME! KURONEKO TURNED DIABLO!

Rem: What was that?

Vash: O.o I dunno, and I think we shouldn't know it at all. Come, I will buy you more flowers.

Rem: ^_^ Oh Vash.

Vash: *blush* ^______________________^

Legato: +_\\

Kuroneko: Nyahhahaaahhaahaahhaa! (A/N: Kuroneko = Evil !! O.O SHINE NEKO, SHINE! .)

// O // O // O //

Hornfreak: Damn, she didn't come. -_-

Dominique: Hey! Hornfreak!

Midvalley: Why is everyone now in the park but my date isn't? T_T

Dom: Date? Why don't you play with your whores? Hey, what happened to your girlfriend? ^_~

Mid: Girlfriend?? What a hell are you talking about? O.ô

Dom: Sylvia of course! XD HAHAHAA!

Mid: T_T You are SO dead if I would had my Sylvia with me.

Dom: Hahaa hey, sorry, Middy. Come with me to Longshot and let's have a drink.

Mid: You are in a good mood? Did something happened? O.ô

Dom: Well, I just bored like everyone else right now so are you coming or not?

Mid: Hmm okay.

Dom: ^_^

Legato: *hides still in the bush* T_\\ They are getting softheads I have to put them in order, right after when I have save my Master *looks around* Where is that evil witch?

Kuroneko: Nya. *points the sitting couple*

Legato: Good Kuroneko. Now Kuroneko go spy them and bring me information,

Kuroneko: Hai. *leaves*

Legato: O.\\ Did that cat said 'Hai'?!

// O // O // O //

Knives: T_T That women

Dee: T_T She and Vash that's just too much I mean, look at them

Knives: That women is slaving my brother that's disgusting!

Dee: Um can I stop solving that women now, Knives?

Knives: No! Continue!

Dee: Hai. -_- She's ugly.

Knives: Darn right she is! A freaking hippie! T_T

Kuroneko: Nya! =^_^=

Dee: YOU ARE ALIVE? Again? O.o

Knives: Huh?

Dee: I have killed that cat all ready 2 times!

Knives: Maybe there are a whole family of Kuronekos.

Dee: Maybe... *pets*

Kuroneko: Nya... =^_^=

Dee: Oh, it's so cute. ^_^

Knives: -_-;; {Now, she went crazy - finally.}

Dee: *evil grin* Nice kitty *pets*

Kuroneko: Nya. =^_^=

Dee: DIE! *throws the cat in a bush where Legato is* STUPID CAT!

Knives: -_-;;; {She's back to normal again.} Let's go eat something

Dee: There a new restaurant in town.

Knives: Well, the let's go there and spend my new MasterCard.

Legato: ;_\\ That's MY MasterCard

Kuroneko: +_+

Legato: Let's go my minion!

Kuroneko: x_x 

// O // O // O //

Vash: x_x. 

Rem: ^_^

Vash: x_x. Rem-dear?

Rem: ^_^

Vash: Rem!

Rem: Yes, Vash darling? ^_^

Vash: Can we have a brake? My back is killing me because of this shopping aren't 25 bags of shopping enough, Rem?

Rem: T_T No. You can rest later. There is a huge sale in the mall.

Vash: O.o S-s-a-a-l-l-e?? *faints* +_+.

Rem: Vash! Get up! Don't lie there like a some idiot! It's embarrassing. *slaps*

Vash: O.O. 

Rem: Come on, Vash! Let's go! :-o I need to shop!

Vash: o.O. {Is that sweet Rem?!} ;_;

Rem: VASH!

Vash: Coming!

:: Behind a tree ::

Dee: Good thing that we walked by this shop.

Knives: BWHUHAHAHAHAAA! Did you saw his face? I knew it! I knew it! That women is no-good-human-scum like the rest animals.

Dee: So true. That Rem, seems to be a quite bitch.

Knives: T_T But she won't never win this one women I know.

Dee: Really? Who is this bitchy women?! O.ô

Knives: T_T;; Err she's friend of author annoying bitchy short-tempered

Dee: Meryl? Pop Monkey said she's a real bitch.

Knives: No, not quite her. -_-;; But that was a close guess.

Dee: Well what se looks like?

Knives: Tall, skinny, brown short hair, blue eyes, messy clothes

Dee: HEY! You are talking about me! :-O You fucking jackass!

Knives: HEHEHEE! *evil grin*

:: Behind another tree ::

Legato: {That's my Master.} ^_\\

Kuroneko: Nya! =T_T=

Legato: Shh! They maid hear us. T_\\

// O // O // O //

:: The Last Samurai - Restaurant ::

Knives: T_T Why?

Dee: O.ô

Knives: T_T Why you are here?

Rei-Dei: I own this place and E.G. and Monev works here too. Since legato doesn't give us any job, we don't get money.

Knives: I see well whatever that's not my business. You worthless ex-minion of mine, bring us 2 steaks.

Dee: ^_^

Rei-Dei: Right away, sir.

Dee: I must say, you have really odd minions I mean ex-minions.

Knives: They are as odd as you are. T_T

Dee: T_T You maybe have forgot that I carry a gun under my black mini-shirt.

Knives: O.o;;

Legato: *sits in a corner, behind a newspaper* How that women dares to say that to MY master? _\\

Kuroneko: Nya!

Legato: What - I told you to stay outside. No pets are not allowed to come in this restaurants. Didn't you see the sing?

Kuroneko: *purr* =^_^=

Legato: Stupid car -_\\

Knives: T_T

Dee: What's wrong, darling?

Knives: I felt something. I think someone is watching us. _

Legato: *hides under the table* EEP! O.\\

Knives: Oh is that darn cat again. *sees only Kuroneko sitting in a table.

Dee: GOD! I HATE THAT CAT! *takes out her F. Marlom Special*

Knives: Don't you dare to miss it!

Dee: Hah! Since when I have miss my target?!

Knives: Hmm, you have a good point. Just kill it.

Author: NO!

Everyone: O.o

Knives: YOU AGAIN!

Author: You are on a date now! You shouldn't be killing!

Knives: I'm Millions Knives and this is Little Dee a.k.a. Akuma.

Author: I KNOW THAT! T_T But still I'm trying to keep this in PG-13 and romance/humor fic god dammed!

Knives: Guess what? You failed! *takes Dee's gun and shoots Kuroneko*

Kuroneko: x_x

Knives: I had enough. Dee, we are out of here!

Dee: Fine with me!

Author: -_- Darn, there went Kuroneko # 71. Someone, bring Kuroneko # 72 here!

Random person: Here!

Kuroneko # 72: Nya! =^_^=

Author: Don't just stand there, put in on the table! Gees, what wrong with people anyway. I'm trying for the first time write a romance fic in English! *mumbles and leaves*

Random: *puts the new Kuroneko on table and leaves*

Legato: O.\\ So that's how that cat is everywhere there is whole punch of Kuronekos! A Kuroneko army!

End Of Part 6

TO BE CONTINUED  


  



	7. Legato's Past

DATING DISASTER // PART 07 // LEGATO'S PAST

PopMonkey7: Today I have make a special chapter and we are going to have s little chat with Millions Knives and Legato Bluesummers and that's it for now. Enough small talks, let's start the converstation right away. Welcome Knives and Legato, to my kindom, PopMonkey7's hideout, where all the HTML-queen's magic happens.

Knives: That sounded somehow very disturbing. ._

Pm7: I mean HTML-coding you baka!

Legato: *looks around* Master, there is lots of pictures of you. And Vash. O.\\

Knives: _ I can see that. … *to Legato* You are in some of them too. 

Legato: Yes, master.

Knives: What a hell is that? O.ô Yu… gi.. oh? Never heard of it?

Legato: Excel? Saga?

Knives: Gravitation? Shaman King? Naruto? What is all this junk? O.o

Knives: Trigun? What's that? Looks familiar…

Legato: Master! I would a mini you! O.\\

PopMonkey7: DON'T TOUCH THAT! IT'S MY PRECIOUS!!

Knives: O.o What a hell? Is that me? I DON'T LOOK THAT UGLY!

PopMonkey7: *turns red* DON'T TOUCH MY PRECIOUS TRIGUN ACTION FIGURES!

Legato: Trigun? O.\\

PopMonkey7: Nevermind, let's just start the chat moment. *ignores the action figure* Please have a set. *point blue sofa next to her*

Legato: *sits* -_\\

Knives: WHY IN THE EARHT YOU HAVE THAT, THAT - THING!? *waves Knives action figure madly around* I'M NOT THIS FAT! THE HAIR IS ALL WRONG! EVERYTHINGS! I'N NON-PERFECT!

PopMonkey7: MILLIONS KNIVES! SIT DOWN AND DON'T TOUCH MY STUFF! XO *takes the figure and put in a box and locks the box* Better… -_-

Knives: O.o

Legato: Why you! How dare you talk to Him like that, you low and worthless scum!

Knives: Legato… shut up. It's my job to yell her.

Legato: Yes, master. I'm sorry, master. -_\\ I don't need your forgiveness. *sits down*

PopMonkey7: It must be fun to have minions, Knives, isn't it? ^_^

Knives: Sometimes, yes, but not always. Especially the minion is been creepy and follows YOU WHEREVER you go… .

PopMonkey7: I see what you mean… *looks at Legato* …I have minons, but non of them isn't as good looking as Legato and a total freak at the same time… .

Legato: Are you talking about me? O_\\

PopMonkey7: Nope. We were talking about Elendira The Crimsonnail. T_T;;

Legato: Oh. He os she… is a real bitch.

Knives: -_-;;

PopMonkey7: I believe you are a really a blond, Legato. T_T

Legato: How come?

Knives: Should we start now? T_T;; I'm only here because I'm afraid that you would write something yaoi about me again.

Pm7: Yaoi? *evil hentai grin* No, not in this fic… maybe… anyway… 

Knives: Yes, yes, whatever. I wanna get out of this creepy room what is full of japanese stuff and stuffed animals. -_-

PopMonkey: Okay, okay! Calm down! *takes a breath* So how did you 2 guys met?

Knives: It was a long time ago and I was wandering around Gunsmoke until I ended up in this small town and I felt like I wanted to destory or blow up something -

PopMonkey7: That's not new. u_u

Legato: How dare you interrupt my Master, you -

PopMonkey7 + Knives: Shut up!!

Legato: Hai. -_\\

Knives: The longer you speak, the longer I have to suffer! So shut up.

Legato: Hai. -_\\

Knives: Um, where was I… oh yes… so, I was walking around this town and I passed by this one school and I saw this little kid…

Pm7: Who was Legato?

Knives: Yes. A small thin kid with a lollipop and had a blue hair and all the kid was picking him…

Pm7: Oh you poor thing. *pets Legato*

Legato: T_\\ pissed off!!

Knives: Anyway. Little Legato walk to me and he looked up to me and I remember how he tried to use mind powers on me. But of course, didn't work. *small smirk*

Legato: I have always been a weak one against my Master. He's perfect. No one can win him. -_\\

Knives: Yeah, yeah… whatever… And then I though that I could have some use for him, since his parents came to take him and his brother -

Pm7: You have a brother, Legato? O.o I though you had a little sister!

Legato: I DON'T' HAVE A BROTHER OR SISTER!

Pm7: O.o;;

Knives: _ Shall I continue?

Pm7: Oh yes, sure. Go ahead.

Legato: -_\\

Knives: Ahem. So Legato's parents came and took Legato and his brother away and I saw how Legato hated them badly. They treated him like a I would treat a human and then suddenly, Legato came to me…

Pm7: Thanks Knives. Now I wanna hear something for Legato too.

Knives: Whatever. -_-

Legato: Um… like my Master said, I came back to my Him and since then I have been serving my Master.

Pm7: Is that all? You parents treated you badly and kids picked you in school and so you wanted suddenly serve deadly-sexy Knives? O.o … I wish I had mind powers! .

Legato: -_\\ Low life.

Pm7: Okay… so your parents were real meanies, because that you hate humans so badly even now. And what about brother then? Did he hated you?

Legato: I don't have a brohter.

Knives: Well, you have, Legato. And very odd one too.

Pm7: What do you mean, Knives?

Knives: Later after Legato and I left, I met Legato's brother, Fred and he… he fits bit in same category with Crimsonnail.

Pm7: What? Is he trassexual too? O.o

Legato + Knives: NO!

Pm7: Then what?

Knives: You better not know… I just hope he will never show up. -_-

Pm7: Um, okay… *thinking something evil*

Legato: You will die if you call him over to this fic!!

Pm7: Okay, okay! I won't… gees, you guys are no fun… _

Knives: Well, was that all?

Pm7: No! I wanna more details! Legato, did everyone picked ou because of your 'freak-nature'?

Legato: If you mean my hair, eyes, power and obsession if food, skulls, spikes and blood… then yes.

Pm7: Um… O.o…. err… and did your parens just let you go just like that?

Legato: Yes. They hated me too. They wanted to get rid of me all the long…

Pm7: That's, that's… so sad!! ;_; POOR LEGATO! *hugs*

Legato: Back off… T_\\ Ready to kill.

Knives: No. Let her hug. It looks fun. *evil smirk*

Legato: -_\\

Pm7: Maybe you want a hug too Knivesu-babe? *wink*

Knives: T_T;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; No thanks, I get enough from Dee. By the way… WHY DID I HAVE TO BE WITH DEE?? I HATE HER!!! WHY CAN'T SHE JUST DIE OR LEAVE ME ALONE??? YOU ARE THE AUTOHOR, SO GET RIP OFF HER RIGHT NOW!!!!

Pm7: I tell you a secret Knives… *stops hugging poor Legato and looks deadly serious* Dee … she's really… a… a… *hyper* ALIEN SPY from Jupiter and she came to kill you and tries to take over the world and kill all the humans that she hate and make you her fiancee and marry you and something like that!!!!!! *clams down* But don't' worry… *wink, wink* Legato will save you Knives and you will be lovers and then you two will be all kissing and -

Knives + Legato: WHAT?????????????????????????????????????????!!! .O.O O.\\

Pm7: Um, sorry… wrong fic…

Knives: …. Does some… write stuff like that… about me… and Legato?!!! .

Legato: O.\\

Pm7: Yes. Me! XD And some other fangirls of you two! BWHUHHAHAHAHHAHAAHAAA!

Knives: I should have know… -_-;;;;

Legato: You, you… wortless… nothing!

Pm7: T_T Do I see you blushing, Legato? Maybe you would like that to happened? If you do, I will defenity do it. *evil smirk*

Knives: If you dare to think about it I will surely kill you most painfulles way!!

Legato: -_\\ I deserve to die, Master, but I wasn't thinking anything like that. I just want hot dogs.

Pm7: Good lie, Legato, but not good enough. I shall punish you under the name of Fifth Moon! *Sailor Moonlight Shadow pose*

Knives: -_-;;;;;;;;;;;;;; I'm leaving!

Pm7: I'm sorry, Knives. That was maybe over the line, but don't worry. Just let us end this chapter with a peaceful chat, shall we? ^_^;;

Knives: NO! *death glare* I'm leaving now! You had enough info about Legato so let's go.  
Legato: Yes, master. -_\\

Knives + Legato: *leaves*

Pm7: Darn… I wanted to so much hear about this Fred boy... oh well… *hacker mode* Time for work for HTML-queen now. Opearation 'Who is Fred Bluesummers'! *hacks in to some files in the net*

… later that week …

Pm7: *sits on her office* (A/N: Yes, I have a office, what I will explane later in the fic why I have it. ^_~)

Door: *nock. nock*

Pm7: I'm busy. *makes paperplanes*

???: Um, I though we had a meeting today…

Pm7: Are you Fred?

???: Yes, Fred Bluesummers

Pm7: Then come on in. *stop making paperplanes and looks deadly serious business women* ^_^

Fred: Hello. //_^

Pm7: O.O

Fred: Is something wrong?

Pm7: This is a dream come true. *.*

Fred: Huh?

Pm7: I don't own Trigun, but I own Fred!

Fred: Huh? You own me? //.o

Pm7: _ Shut up! I'm making this chapters ending speaach now.

Fred: Oh, ok.

Pm7: So stay tuned! And let's see what I will do to Legato and who shall suffer next. BWHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAAA!

Fred: To be continued. //_^  


End Of Part 7

  



	8. Stalker Meryl

DATING DISASTER // PART 08 // STALKER MERYL

A/N: Okay, I'm gonna die soon, since I called Fred over to this fic, but he won't be here, not yet. Let's hope that Knives isn't in a mood to kill! ^o^;; I understand pretty hell why Legato don't admit that he has a brother and Knives don't wanna see him… but I love Fred. XD Enough bullshit. I don't own Trigun so bet it.

^*^*^*^

:: At Black Cat Café ::

Vash: ^_^.

Rem: n_n

Vash: ^_^.

Rem: n_n

Vash: ^_^.

Rem: n_n

Meryl: T_T *hides behind a newspaper AKA spying*

Vash: ^_^.

Rem: n_n

Meryl: T_T;;

… later …

:: At The Flower Shop ::

Vash: ^_^.

Rem: n_n Look Vash. Red flowers.

Vash: ^_^. *buys red flowers for Rem* Here.

Rem: Oh Vash. n_n

Meryl: *eats flowers in anger* T_T;;;;

… later …

:: At The Cinema ::

Vash: ^__^. *arms around Rem*

Rem: n_n

Meryl: *eats popcorns in anger* T___T;;;;;

… much later …

:: At Ice Cream Bar ::

Rem: n_n

Vash: ^_^.

Meryl: T__T;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

??: Why are you spying Vash and that lady?

Meryl: O.o Jessica?

Jessica: Yes me. ^_^ (A/N: The 'evil' blond girl from episode 20 & 21 who wanna marry Vash)

Meryl: What in the earth are you doing here?

Jessica: I think the same as you. Spying Vash and that lazy, who has take my husband.

Meryl: ¬_¬

Jessica: *sits down and orders an ice cream*

Meryl: ¬_¬

Jessica: I think we should team up and get rid of that black haired lady and then see who Vash will take his girlfriend.

Meryl: No. I'm not interest to be that stupid morons girlfriend?

Jessica: Then why are you spying them? You must be jealous!

Meryl: Me?! Jealous?! O.O NEVER!! T_T *storms out*

Rem: Vash, weren't that your friend, Meryl Stryfe?

Vash: Where? *looks around* Hmm… maybe… O.o. …but what was she doing here?

^*^*^*^

Pm7: "Millions Knives was going back to home after the conversation with me, where Legato was. After that he and Legato went to homes and here we are at Knives home door…"

Knives: SHUT UP AND STOP FOLLOWING ME AROUND AND DIE!

Pm7: *yells from somewhere far away* Never! BWHUHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAAHAAHA!

Knives: Just leave me alone! I hate to be your toy! Been with Dee is bad enough! I hate to be on your fan fictions!

Dee: *opens door* KNIVESU-BABE! ^__^ *bear hug*

Knives: T_T;;;;;;;; PopMonkey7, you really hate me, because I lie to you, don't you? (A/N: Stories To Tell - Episode 8 ; Knives promised me to be a Gung-Ho Gun if I kill Crimsonnail and give Knives' Long Colt back. . Well, guess what. I gave the gun back, but he escapes and I have been tricked!)

Dee: Who are you talking, darling?

Knives: Never mind, let's go in…

Pm7: *somewhere far away* BWHUHAHAHAHAHAAAHAAAHAA!

Legato: *hides in a bush* That idiot author should die and free my Master from this hellish suffering. T_\\

Pm7: T_T Ahem. I can erase you from this story whenever I want to, so behave or yaoi for you!

Legato: O.\\ Hai!

Pm7: Trallalalalalaaa… it's so good to be the author… lalalaaalaaalaaaa! *sings really badly*

^*^*^*^

Meryl: *mumbles something crazy*

Wolfwood: … _

Meryl: … T_T …

Wolfwood: Since you came home, you have been all mad and stuff. Did something happen?

Meryl … T_T …

Wolfwood: C'mon. You can tell me.

Meryl: …

Wolfwood: Meryl.

Meryl: … WHO COULD SHE SAY THAT I'M JEALOUS TO THAT NO-GOOD BRAINLESS JELLY HEAD, THAT IDIOT BROOM HEAD, BUTTER BRAIN DROOL EYE DONUT FREAK WHO ONLY BRINGS TROUBLE?????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wolfwood: … O.o .. um… maybe I shouldn't have ask… -_-

Meryl: I'M NOT JEALOUS TO REM! SHE ISN'T EVEN A GOOD LOOKING AND PRETTY -

Vash: T_T.

Meyl: O.o Vash!

Vash: T_T.

Wolfwood: Oh shit! I'm out of cigarettes. I need to go buy some! Buy! ^.^;; *gone*

Meryl: O.o;; Um… hey… Vash.

Vash: T_T. Did you say that my Rem isn't pretty?

Meryl: No! No! No! I mean… the band! Yes, the band Rem! Damn, that they play boring music, don't you think too? ^_^;;;

Vash: T_T. I won't talk to you never again, Meryl. *leaves*

Meryl: Vash… I'm…

Vash: *slams the door*

Meryl: …sorry… u_u …

…

Wolfwood: Is it all clam now…? Can I come back now?

Meryl: Sure, whatever… -_-

Wolfwood: Oh good.

Meryl: …

Wolfwood: He's really angry, isn't he?

Meryl: Yes…

Wolfwood: Well… you can only blame yourself, Meryl.

Meyrl: I know…

Wolfwood: ^_^ Make a confession and it all be all right again! *takes out his little crush* Coin in the hole and God will forgive all your sin! ^__^

Meryl: *slap*

Wolfwood: x_X

Meryl: *storms out*

Wolfwood: …did I say something wrong… ?? … x_X

^*^*^*^

Legato: So… hungry… ;_\\ *still in the bush* But I can't think food now! I need to save my master!

Pm7: *pops suddenly next to Legato* Listen Legato. I have made it very clearly that Knives and Dee are not meant to be together. This only temporary, so calm down. You have much bigger problems to thinks… like your MasterCard bill… u_u *gives the bill to Legato*

Legato: *looks at the bill* O.\\ 60, 000 000 000 $$ ?!

Pm7: Oh, oops, that was Vash's wanted poster. ^_^;; Gomen nasai. This is YOUR bill.

Legato: 100 million dollars???????????????????????? O.\\

Pm7: Knives bough a new computer, TV, stereos, the hamster and for the hamster some stuff, new sofa, books, clothes, food, some bomb stuff, bullets for his Long Colt, lightbulds…

Legato: But, but… I'm sure that all of those together are not 100 millions dollars.

Pm7: That's right. Then we come to Dee, who stole the car when you and Knives were with me in last chapter. ^_^ You know her; drinks, drinks, drinks, guns, drinks, bullets, clothes, camping, drinks, cigarettes, more guns, guns, new part for her body, more drinks… Dee's body parts are VERY expensive. ^_^

Legato: ;_\\

Pm7: *hug* Oh poor Legato. But don't you worry. I have a job for you, so you can get money to pay this bill and you can take the rest money from the Gung-Ho Guns. n_n

Legato: Sometimes I fear your way of thinking. T_\\ What kind of job you little brat have?

Pm7: *evil grin* Mostly as my bodyguard and then you could become a star of a new show too. ^_~

Legato: Star of a show? What kind of show?

Pm7: A show, where you only have to read what the papers say. That's all. n_n

Legato: T_\\ There's something fishy about this… fish… *drools* ARGH! I'M SO HUNGRY! I NEED FOOD! NEED MONEY…. Okay! Okay! I do it! I need money! Just give me the job!

Pm7: Yay! I finally got my first real minion!! *jumps around* I WILL SHOW YOU KNIVES THAT I WILL TAKE OVER THE WORLD!! BWHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAAA!!

Legato: -_\\;; What have I done.

Knives: SHUT UP! I'M WATCHING JERRY SPRINGER!

Pm7: Sorry, Knviesu-babe! … Come Legato. I buy you a hot dog!

Legato: HAI! ^_\\

Pm7: By the way. I'm now on your new mistress, so you should call my that.

Legato: T_\\ Never!

Pm7: Do it or I write yaoi! T_T I can do that easily! I will put you together with Vash!

Legato: O.\\ You couldn't do that! That's just too cruel!

Pm7: *evil grin* Oh really? Is what you think? Well, think again, pretty boy. :-D Now, come on Legato-san, we have work to do and hot dogs to buy.

Legato: T_\\ Yes, mistress.

(A/N: Beware of the yaoi fangirl! XD)

^*^*^*^

Meryl: T_T

Jessica: T_T

Meryl: I don't understand this…

Jessica: Me too.

Meryl: What Vash sees in Rem? I mean come on, she looks… so boring. T_T

Jessica: Yes. We are much prettier than that… so called saint.

Meryl: I agree!

Jessica + Meryl: *spies Vash & Rem in the corner table of the Black Cat Cafe*

Vash: ^_^.

Rem: n_n

Vash: ^_^.

Rem: n_n

Vash: ^_^.

Rem: n_n

Zazie: *enters the cafe* … T_T Why is that broom head here? … *sits down* One milk shake, please!

Hoppered: One milk shake, coming.

Rem: Oh look at that cute boy, Vash. n_n *points Zazie*

Vash: …yes... ^_^;;; ..um.. very cute indeed {Oh my God! I lied to Rem!}

Zazie: Where is she? She's late again.

Zazie's Girlfriend *enters* Hey Zazie! ^_^

Zazie: *blushes* n_n

Everyone: Zazie and -

Pm7: *pops up from nowhere* TO BE CONTINEUD !!

Legato: That was mean. I wanted to know who is Zazie's girlfriend. T_\\ *eats hot dogs*

Pm7: End of part 8! BWHUHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAA! *went crazy*

Legato: I hate my job all ready… -_-

Pm7: What was that, Legato darling? n_n+

Legato: Nothing, mistress. -_\\  


  



	9. With Love, Mistress

DATING DISASTER // PART 09 // WITH LOVE, MISTRESS

A/N: I love Hamtaro. Not the anime, the hamster in THIS fic. T_T I own him/her… err, it! But I don't own Trigun… okay I lied, I own Legato! XD Bwuhahahahahaaaa!!

// o // o // o //

Knives: .T_T

Hamtaro: =T_T=

Knives: Why? .T_T

Hamtaro: =T_T=

Knives: Why?! Answer me! .T_T

Hamtaro: …

Knives: ANSWER ME, GOD DAMMED HAMSTER! ..

Hamtaro: Eep. =^_^=

Dee: What's wrong darling? ^_^

Knives: YOU CAN ALL DIE AND BURN IN HELL! .. *storms out*

Dee: What is his problem? O.ô

Hamtaro: Eep. Eep. =^_^=

Dee: Don't say you just eat the last page from his 'The Best World Domination Guide' - books last page? T_T 

Hamtaro: Eep! =^___^=

Dee: -_-;; So you really did it? …no wonder he was mad to you.

// o // o // o //

Pm7: ^__^ *singing Kaze Wa Mirai Ni Fuku happily*

Legato: -_\\ *follows his mistress*

Pm7: *stops* Well Legato. What do you think about that building? *points big, big, big building*

Legato: Isn't that Perfect Match's main place? -_\\

Pm7: Yes, and we are going to visit in the boss room now. n_n

Legato: Why?

Pm7: n_n Just because it's fun. C'mon Legato-san.  
:: Soon In The 72 floor ::

Secretary: Hi Pop Monkey!

Pm7: Hello my shadow reflection, Monkey Stampede, where is my egoist insane anti-protagonist shadow clone, Evil Pop Monkey Clone?

MS The Secretary: *lights cigarette* Fooling around, doing something evil.

Pm7: Well, if you see her, tell that I need to have a small talk to her.

MS: Yes, yes, boss…

Legato: O.\\

Pm7: *enters the boss room* What do you say, Legato-san… isn't this nicely designed room? n_n

Legato: O.\\

Pm7: What are you staring at baka? T_T

Legato: You are the boss of Perfect Match? O.\\

Pm7: Well, yes. ^_^ Isn't it great?

Legato: How old are you?

Pm7: 16. ^_^

Legato: Then you must be genius. Running a huge company like this.

Pm7: No, my shadow egos are much smarter than me. I'm 100% baka. ^_^ I just own this idea Monkey Stampede and Evil Pop Monkey Clone do all the real job here. ^_^ I'm just fooling around like a jackass. People think that Monkey Stampede is the real boss, because she looks much older and serious than me. XP

Legato: … … o.\\

Pm7: Candy? ^_^ *hands a bowl of candies*

Legato: Um, yes please.

Pm7: Please, sit down, Legato-san. ^_^ Now, we will fill up your job papers, since you are going to be the new host. ^_^ 

Legato: Do I have to? -_\\

Pm7: You never argued against Knives' will. T_T Why can't you act bit more of like I was Knives or at least I was a real mistress?

Legato: I'm not obsessed to little brats like you. Master Knives is different from everyone.

Pm7: Good point… oh well… at least I own you now! XD

Legato: -_\\;;

*knock, knock*

Pm7: What now?! T_T

MS: Um, sorry boss… but Fred Love is here.

Pm7: *.* Perfect timing! Bring him in!

MS: Yes, boss.

Legato: Who is he, mistress?

Pm7: *goofy grin* A very lovely person, your co-host. ^__^

Legato: Fred Love?! That's the stupidest name I have ever hear. -_\\

Door: *opens and person enters*

Pm7: Konnichiwa Fred-san! n_n

Fred: *tall guy in light pink shirt, tight black jeans, white tie with red hearts and blue hair enters the room* Oh hello PopMonkey7-chan. It's so fancy to see ya again. //_^ *hugs*

Pm7: *hugs back* Oh Fred, it always so great to see ya. ^__^

Legato: O.\\;; …no, no way… not you… NO!

Fred: *.* … LEGATO?! Is that you?! OH LITTLE BROTHER! *big brotherly bear hug*

Legato: ;_\\ …no…

Pm7: I didn't know you two were brothers. *evil grin*

Legato: YOU PROMISED NOT TO CALL HIM IN THIS FIC! NOW I HAVE TO KILL YOU! *uses his powers on PM7*

Pm7: ^_^ Remember I'm too stupid for your super cool powers Legato and I'm not humans so they don't' work on me. Tee hee.

Fred: //_o May I ask what are you 2 talking about?

Legato: Shut up, Freddie.

Pm7: Freddie? Is that your real name? *.* It's so cute!

Fred: *blushes* Thank you, Pop Monkey-chan. //_^

Legato: Why? Why is your name Fred Love now days, Freddie? T_\\

Fred: It much more fancier than Freddie Bluesummers… ya know… Fred Love suits me better than Freddie Bluesummers.

Legato: T_\\ Back off, FREAK!

Fred: Oh my. You seems to be bit tight today. It seems you haven't got enough hugs today. //_^ *even bigger brotherly bear hug*

Legato: .\\ POPMONKEY7!!

Pm7: Don't you dare yell to me, Legato! Even if it looks like I did this, but I didn't. Honestly! I'm your mistress and you shall obey me. Knives is history. *evil grin*

Legato: ;_\\

Fred: Oh Legato, is so good to see you brother! //_^

Legato: Are you listening? Back off. T_\\

Fred: Of brother! //_^

Legato: Obvious not... -_\\;;

Pm7: You 2 are going to be great host. ^______^

Legato: ;_\\

// o // o // o //

Knives: Everywhere I go, there's only morons… -_- …and those stupid Perfect Match posters. Seems that it really popular and people are more depressive than ever. …AND WHY DA HELL I'M TALKING TO MYSELF?! ..

Vash: KNIVES! O.O.

Knives: Vash. What are you doing here? .T_T

Vash: *jumps behind his brother* You must hide me! The girls are after me!

Knives: Girls? Shouldn't you be after them?

Vash: Well, yes, but these 3… they are all crazy… Rem, Meryl and Jessica… they have gone crazy and they are fighting over me now. ;_;.

Knives: So? Shouldn't you happy about it? 3 girls that really likes you… what's your problem?

Vash: They are crazy! I mean it! Even Rem. They are really fighting and I'm afraid that they will kill me soon.

Knives: .O.Ô Rem fighting? That I must see! Where are they?!

Vash: Coming right this way!

Knives: Where?!

Meryl: VASH YOU BAKA! COME HERE! .

Jessica: VASH!

Knives: .o.ô … I think you better run and fast now, brother.

Vash: Good plan, Knives!! *stampedes away*

Knives: .O.O *sees 3 angry looking women running after Vash* …I hope that idiot will be alive. He owns me a pizza. ..  
// o // o // o //

Vash: Must. Hide. Now. Fast. Trashcan! *jumps into trashcan* ^_^ I'm save now.

Kuroneko: Nya! =T_T=

Vash: Oh, sorry… was this your hiding place? Um, may I you share it with me, please? ^.^.;;

Kuroneko: NYA! NYA! NYO! =.=

Vash: Pretty please. I will buy you tuna. ..

Kuroneko: =^_^= Nyo.

Vash: -_-.;;

…

Meryl: Where is that idiot broom head?!

Jessica: I will find him first and I will marry him so back off bitch!

Rem: But Vash loves me the most.

Vash: {True, true!} ^_^.

Pm7:Girls, girls, girls… stop the fighting…

M + J + R: ??

Legato: -_\\

Fred: //_^

Meryl: What is That? *points Fred*

Pm7: Isn't he cute? He is Fred Love. ^_^ Fred, say hi to, bitchy Meryl.

Fred: Hi Meryl. //_^

Legato: -_\\;; He's NTO my brother.

Fred: What are you talking about lil' bor? //_^

M + J +R: ???

Pm7: Ahem!

Fred+ Legato: Sorry, PopMonkey7.

Pm7: Thanks you, boys. I'm here to give you 3 a message.

Jessica: Message?

Pm7: Yes. A message. A message from Perfect Match. Fred?

Fred: Um, yes. Next weekend we are having a special show and Perfect Match wants to invite 3 there as our special guest. //_^

Legato: -_\\

Jessica: Wow! Really?! Cool!

Pm7: And one hint, Vash the Stampede is there too. ^_~

Vash: I am? O.o.

Meryl: What was that?!

Vash: O.o;; I'm just a talking trashcan! Hee heh! Just ignore me! *trashcan jumps away*

Eveyone: O.o ??

Rem: What was that?

Fred: It looks like a talking and jumping trashcan.

Everyone: -_-;,

Legato: We can see that, Fred! T_\\

Fred: //_^

Legato: Idiot… -_\\;;

PM7: Legato, behave yourself. T_T

Legato: Yes, mistress. -_\\

Pm7: Ahem, anyway… are you 3 coming?

Jessica: Sure.

Meryl: If it's free.

Rem: We will be there.

Fred: That's just fabulous. //_^

Pm7: ^_^ You will get your VIP-passes in couple days… so we will see ya there then. Boys! Let's go buy some sweets and Mountain Dew! XP

Fred: Hai, Pop Monkey-chan. //_^

Legato: Mistress. May I have an ice cream?

Pm7: Sure: Anything you wanna, Legato-san.

…

Meryl: I don't wanna know if that's really Legato. O.o;;

End Of Part 9

  



	10. The Bluesummers Brothers

DATING DISASTER // PART 10 // THE BLUESUMMERS BROTHERS

A/N: Fred and Legato! Love them! Now! BWHUHAHAHAHAHAAAAHHAHAHAHAAHAAA! BTW, I don't own Trigun, even if I sometimes say so. Tee hee! ^_^

// o // o // o //  


Knives: Why can't you just go kill people like you normally did?

Dee: But I wanna be with you Knivesu-babe…

Knives: -_-;;

Wolfwood: Hey, Knives, don't worry… you are not the only on with problems like that… -_-_?

Milly: Oh Mr. Priest! ^___^

Knives: I see… .T_T Do we have any popcorn?

Milly: Oh my… no…

Knives: *evil grin* Well, what's the point of watching TV if we don't have popcorn. I will go buy it. Come Chapel.

Wolfwood: Huh? Um, okay. See ya soon girl.

Dee: Knives-dear, don't be long, because the show will start soon.

Knives: I WON'T. I wouldn't NEVER wanna miss that show. .-_-

Wolfwood: See ya girls.

Dee + Milly: Bye.

Knives + Wolfwood: *off to short freedom*

Milly: Mr. Knives has come very nice person. I mean look at him. He's is coming so well along with my Wolfwood. ^__^

Dee: ^__^ Hee heh. Maybe I have softened him a bit.

// o // o // o //

Knives: Damn you Chapel! You won again! .T_T

Wolfwood: Hey, it was your idea that we go bowling…

Knives: Yeah I know. Ah, finally I got away from that evil bitch.

Wolfwood: Why don't you blast her with your Angel Arm? T_T_?

Knives: She has once surviveve from my Angel Arm, so I'm sure she can even now. -_-;;

Wolfwood: O.o;;;

// o // o // o //

  
Pm7: Legato! Come out! NOW! *bangs the door* .

Legato: I don't wanna! I wanna my skull and spikes back!

Pm7: You are tonight a host, not a evil freaky minion! Come out or I tell everyone about what you said last night in your dream!

Legato: Dream? … You wouldn't dare!

Pm7: I dare! Just listen to this! Oh Master… do it again, Master! Oh Master I -

Legato: *comes out* T_\\ SHUT UP!

Pm7: *.* You looks so handsome in that black smoky, Legato-san. It suits you perfectly.

Legato: I wanna my skull and spikes! ;_\\

Pm7: We need to do small sacrifices sometimes. Legato-san.

Legato: O.\\

Pm7: What?

Legato: Um nothing… o.\\ Err, where's Fred?

Fred: Here I am, little, bro! //_^ *in a black smoky too*

Pm7: You look like twins now! KAWAII! XD

Legato: T_\\ I hate you, mistress, especially now.

Pm7: Hate me later, Legato. Let's go! We have a show to run! XP

Fred: //_^

Legato: ;_\\ I don't wanna go.

(A/N: Do you wanna know why really I pick Legato so often? Well, that's because it's so easy! Too easy! XD BWHUHAHAHAHAAAHAAHAHAAA!)

// o // o // o //

Milly: Oh my. The boys are late. The show is just about to start.

Dee: T_T Knives… that bastard… where is he?

:: In the Bowling Hall ::

Knives: Burn in hell Chapel! ..

Wolfwood: I won again! Woo-hoo!

Knives: … _ Chapel, I will need to kill you soon, if you win one more time.

Wolfwood: O.o;; Eep.

:: Back to the house ::

Milly: ^___^ I'm sure they are just having fun together. Let them be miss Dee.

Dee: Hye, the show!

*insert your favourite theme here*

Fred: //_^ Welcome folks to 'Perfect Match' - dating show! I'm your lovely host, Fred Love and this is my co-host Legato Bluesummers.

Legato: Hey! That's was my line! .\\

Milly + Dee: Legato?! O.O

Pm7: *behind the state* LEGATO! .

Legato: o.\\ Um, sorry mistress… um, where we we?!

Fred: The show, Legato, the show.

Legato: Oh yes. -_\\ Yes, welcome folks to our show. Tonight we are going to have a special guest and 3 other worthless spiders and one of them will be walking out with our special guest.

Fred: Enough small talks, let's bring out guest from Trigun. Trigun's main character, donut loving protagonist -

Legato: ETERNAL SUFFERING! .\\

Fred: Vash the Stampede!! //_^

Hornfreak: *plays music in the background*

Audience: *clap, clap, clap, cheeers*

Vash: *walks in the state with big goofy grin* ^_____^.

Fangirl: We love you Vash!! *.*

Vash: Love & Peace! ^___^. \\// I love you all!

Random Fangirl #1: *faints*

Legato: Shut up or I kill you, idiot broomhead. T_\\

Vash: Hai! O.o.;;

Random Fangirl #2: Leave Vash alone, you meanie! .

Fangirls: *takes out Long Colts*

Legato: O.\\;;

Pm7: -_-;;; *thinking* I will never again give tickets fro free in Anime forums…

Fred: //_^ Err, hih, welcome Mr. Vash to our show.

Vash: Thank you very much. It was quite surprise that you even called me here. I'm so exited about it.

Fred: Great to hear.

Legato: Not! -_\\

Pm7: AHEM!

Legato: -_\\;;

Fred: Well, let's have a seat.

Vash: *sits in red chair*

Fred: *sits next to Vash* It's so fancy to sit next to you, Mr. Vash. //_^

Vash: Thank you, Fred. ^_^.

Fred: Red suits you.

Vash: Are you surely Legato's brother? You are much nicer than Legato himself.

Fred: He's just bit misunderstood, that's all.

Legato: *in the other side of the state* This isn't place for small talks, Fred!

Fred: Sorry, lil' bro. //_^ Would you kindly tell us something about yourself, Vash.

(A/N: Don't worry folks, I will keep the next line away from spoilers. n_n)

Vash: Gladly. I'm handsome gunmen from Planet Gunsmoke. I'm 27 years old. I have green eyes and wonderful blodn hair, like you all can see. I love red, donut and love. I'm honestly hunter of love & peace and I will bring peace tot his unstable planet.

Fangirls: *cheers in tears* VASHU-SAMA! *.*

Vash: ^__^. People really like me here.

Fred: Sure they like. You are so cute. //_^

Legato: GIVE WARM WELCOME TO MISS A! .\\

Hornfreak: *plays music in the background - again*

Audience: *clap, clap*

Fangirls: BOO!

Miss A: Get a life. T_T;;

Legato: Miss B.

Hornfreak: *still playing*

Audience: *clap, clap, clap*

Miss B: ^_^

Fangirls: BOO!

Miss B: O.o

Miss A: It seems that they don't like no one here.

Miss B: Well, what can you do? People have different way of thinking.

Miss: -_-;; Whatever.

Legato: At for last, Miss C. -_\\

Hornfreak: *playing … with chicks now* ^_^ 

Audience: …

Miss C: T_T Hey.

Legato: No one likes you. Sit down, Miss C.

Fred: Well, is everyone on their seats?

Vash: Why can't I see them?

Fred: That's because it would ruin the fun. The thing is that you ask different questions for them and some will the audience and then you will have to make a choice, who of these 3 pretty girls will left this building in your arms //_^ Didn't you read the paper what I gave you before the show?

Vash: No.

Fred: You are just a sweetie. //_^

Legato: BEFORE WE CONTINUE THE SHOW! LET'S HAVE A WORLD FROM OUT SPONSOR! .\\ AND FRED. STOP THAT!

Fred: Stop what?

Legato: THAT! _\\;;

Pm7: Oh shut up, Legato! .

// o // o // o //

Candy Da WereWolf's Kid: Hello everyone!`*^_^*´ I'm Candy-chan. How are you? I'm fine thanks.

Pm7: Get to the point. T_T

Candy: Yeah, yeah… mother… -_-;;

Pm7: What did you say? .

Candy: Nothing. -_-;;

Pm7: Good. T_T Please, continue.

Candy: I'm here to tell you about -

:: screen goes blank ::

Pm7: SIMP! .

Simp the Cameraman: Sorry.

Pm7: Idiot!

Simp: Moron!

Pm7: Baka!

Simp: Jackass!

Candy: Just put the camera on! *.*

Simp: Hai. -_-;;

End of Part 10

Candy: Hey! I haven't finished yet!

Pm7: I got bored. I wanna write part 11 all ready! JA NE!

Simp + Cady: POPMONKEY7!

  



	11. Total Disaster Show

DATING DISASTER // PART 11 // TOTAL DISASTER SHOW

A/N: DUN DUN DUN! I DON'T OWN TRIGUN! *guitar solo* ROCK ON!

// o // o // o //

Hornfreak: *plays some BG music*

Fred: Welcome back to Perfect Match. I'm your wonderful host Fred Love. //_^

Legato: And I'm Legato Bluesummers. -_\\

Fred: Today, we have special guest from famous anime show, called Trigun. Vash the Stampede, the hero of the show is here with me. Hi Vash. How are you doing?

Vash: Fine thanks. ^_^.

Fred: You sure have a sexy mole. //_~

Vash: o///o. Um, thanks.

Fred: Tee hee. //_^ So cute as always, right girls?

Fangirls: HELL YEAH!

Pm7: *banging her head to wall* I don't like those fangirls…. .

Legato: And over here we have 3 worthless spider-women who don't have life and they wants to go on a date with Vash the Donutfreak.

Miss A + B + C: Hey!

Legato: C'mon. I mean, who wants to go out with that broomhead. He doesn't look nothing as like my ex-master. He was really something.

Fred: Knives is really a handsome, but Vash… he's the cutest. Right girls? //_^

Fangirls: HAI! ^_^ WE LOVE YOU VASH!

Vash: Heh hee! *blushing* ^__^.

Fangirls: KAWAII!

Pm7: I had enough! *carries Cross Punisher 3 on the state* I can't stand fangirls if it isn't me! So shut the hell up, evil fangirls! .

Fangirls: EEP! A FREAK ANTI-FANGIRL FANGIRL!

Legaot: ^_\\ Thank you mistress.

Pm7: You're welcome, Legato-san. n_n

Fred: Um, should we take the questions now.

Vash: What questions?

Fred: First we hear 3 random question from audience to miss A, B and C and then you can ask them 5 your own questions.

Vash: Oh. Cool. ^_^.

Fred: Okay, first question… does anyone have a good question for Missies?

Random: I do!

Fred: What's your name?

Random: Cindy.

Fred: Well, hi Cindy. What is your question?

Cindy: Do you like kisses and hugs?

Legato: You heard her. Answer it Miss A.

Miss A: Of course I do, after a successful job.

Legato: What a lame answer. -_\\ Miss B?

Miss B: Well, always. How doesn't like kisses and hugs?

Legato: I don't. -_\\ Miss C.

Miss C: Oh course I do. I would kiss Vash every other second and give him hugs all the time! ^_^

Fangirls: BOO!

Pm7: URUSAI! . Or I shot you!

Fred: What do you think, Vash?

Vash: Do I know these girls?

Fred: You over there! *points a random fangirl* What's your name?

Random Fangirl: Xanatoz.

Fred: Xanatoz? //.o

Xanatoz: Yes. And my question is, what is a perfect place for first dates?

Legato: Miss B. You can answer now.

Miss B: Flower shop. I love flowers and flowers are so romantic.

Vash: *writes notes* Girls… likes… flowers…

Legato: Whatever. Miss C.

Miss C: I would take Vash to my home and make a great dinner from him. ^_^

Legato: You really don't have no life. T_\\ Miss A, give a real answer.

Miss A: Sure, Legato. A café. That's a perfect place

Legato: Thank you, miss A. -_\\ Okay, I'm getting annoyed. Another question and fast.

Random Person: What's the best part in Vash?

Fred: What's is your name?

Random: N. Amless.

Legato: Lameasspunkbitch. -_\\

Pm7: Oh Legato-san. *.* *hug*

Legato: O.\\ What did I just did?

Pm7: You talk like your mistress, how wonderful. ^__^

Fred: You didn't tell me that she was your girlfriend, Legato.

Legato: She's into Knives. I'm just a minion. .\\

Fred: Oh. Anyway… Miss C, could you answer?

Miss C: His green eyes!

Legato: Boring.

Pm7: I agree.

Legato: Miss A?

Miss A: Eyes.

Pm7: Even lamer.

Legato: Miss B?

Miss B: Well, I fon't know, but his hair and eyes are so beautiful.

Pm7: Lamepunklazyassbitch! . This is so boring. Legato, let's go buy a pizza. I'm paying.

Legato: Anytime you want mistress. -_\\

Pm7: Fred, do you work. We are off. JA NE!

Fred: Um, err… hmm… okay. //.o Vash… have you got any questions?

Vash: Yes. May I ask them now?

Fred: Sure.

Vash: Good. Question number 1 is, what is your favourite donut?

Fred: Miss A?

Miss A: I don't like donuts.

Fangirls: BOO!

Miss A: Oh shut up.

Fred: Miss B?

Miss B: Sweet chocolate flavour is my favourite.

Vash: Good taste. ^__^.

Fred: And Miss C?

Miss C: I don't eat donuts. They make me only fat.

Fangirls: BOO! YOU SUX! YOU SUX!

Miss C: Hey! This isn't Smackdown and I'm not Kurt Angle.

Fred: Calm down people. You better ask your questions fast Vash… those fangirls sure look angry and PopMonkey7-chan isn't here to protect us.

Vash: Well, to be honest, I don't wanna make any questions anymore. I know who I wanna.

Fred: You do? Are you sure?

Vash: Yes.

Fred: Well, then… who is she?

Vash: Miss B, of course. ^_^.

Miss A: ARGH!

Miss C: I lost! ;_; Oh Vash. I won't ever be able to marry you! *runs away*

Fred: Looks like she couldn't handle the truth. Vash, do you wanna meet Miss B?

Vash: Yes. ^____^.

Fred: Miss B… would you come over here.

Miss B: Yes? ^_^

Vash: *.*. Rem?

Rem: Hi Vashu.

Miss A: I had enough of this foolish show. I hate you all! *storms out*

Vash: Was that Meryl? O.o.

Rem: Yes, it's looks like. She needs to learn more about love and peace.

Fred: Vash, what are your feelings now? //_^

Vash: I think tis' better if I and Rem would get going now…

Fred: Huh?

Vash: *points the audience*

Fangirls: VASH IS OURS! . *Diablo mode*

Vash: Rem. Let's go!

Rem: No. They won't kill me. I just know they won't.

Vash: Rem. You don't know what fangirls can be like when they get really angry. They are selfish, stone cold killers. Rem, come! *carries Rem away* Thanks Fred and see ya later.

Fangirls AFTER HIM! .

Fred: //.o Eep! Someone save me! //_o

???: *shoots nails to save Fred*

Fred: //.* My hero! *hugs this random hero*

???: Err… they just pissed me off…

Fred: I will never leave you! //_^ *big bear hero hug*

???: Let me guess, you are a Bluesummers?

Fred: How did you guessed, my mistress? //.*

???: -_-;; I'm good in guessing…

// o // o // o //

Pm7: Legato-san? -_-

Legato: Yes, mistress? -_\\

Pm7: Guess what is going to happen next, Legato-san… -_-

Legato: This chapter is going to end soon? -_\\

Pm7: Yes, but before that… -_-

Legato: … I don't know, mistress. -_\\

Pm7: Well, I tell you… You are fired. -_-

Legato: What?! O.\\

Pm7: End of part 11! BWHUHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHAAAHAA! XD Hey, it's that Zazie and his girlfriend? o.o

Legato: Where?

Pm7: TO be continued! BWHUHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA! XD

Legato: I seriously hate you! .\\

  



	12. Normal? Try Weird

DATING DISASTER // PART 12 // NORMAL? TRY WEIRD

A/N: I don't' own Trigun. So, don't shot me! . Just leave me alone… just for a second, please? Pretty please… ah forget it… just die all ready! XO BTW, this chapter is very random and weird. I promise that! So sue me! XD

O - O - O - O

Legato: u_\\

…

Legato: u_\\ I'm so alone…

…

Legato: …and bored…

…

Legato: T_\\ Is there anyone?

…

Legato: I guess not… -_\\

…

Legato: u_\\ …oh this sorrow…

…

Dominique: Hey Legato. What are you doing here, all alone?

Hornfreak: Shouldn't you be servicing PopMonkey7 right now?

Legato: She fired me.

Dom: Why?

Legato: She spend all the company's money to the show last night and she can't afford of me anymore… -_\\

Hornfreak: That's too bad, Legato. But hey, cheer up. I'm sure you will find away to get more money. Come, Dom. I know a great bar near.

Dom: Sure, Midvalley. ^_^

Legato: ô.\\ *thinking* What's with those too? They look like a… …nonsense! Midvalley and Dominique wouldn't never bee together… …or would they? O.\\ …

Knives: Legato!

Legato: O.\\ EEP! It's Master Knives' poltergeist!

Knives: .T_T

Legato: O.\\

Knives: .T_T I'm NOT dead… not yet. But soon I will be… if you don't help me, Legato!

Legato: Help? You? You… want… me to… help you? *.\\

Knives: Yes. Get rid of Dee and I will take you back as my minion.

Legato: What? Really? Yes! Master! I will do it right away! Anything for you ^__\\

Knives: .O.o I have never before seen you that happy, Legato. And it scares.

Legato: I'm sorry Master. -_\\ I won't let that happened ever again. Give me nothingness, give me dead -

Knives: OH SHUT UP! .. … I feel much better all ready… .^_^ …now, Legato… go hunt that bitch down!

Legato: Yes, Master.

Knives: By the way, Dee told me that you were on that stupid dating show last night…

Legato: o__\\ Um, err, well…

Knives: Dee said that your brother was there too… Don't say that he was!

Legato: I'm very sorry Master, but he is here, unfortunately. -_\\

Knives: Then I better hide and fast… I can't stand… that, that… feminism man. .. *leaves*

Legato: -_\\ *talking to himself* Me either Master…

O - O - O - O

Meryl: T_T

Wolfwood: _

Milly: o_o

Meryl: T_T

Wolfwood: Meryl? Are you okay? Since last night in the show you -

Meryl: SHUT UP! .

Wolfwood: O.o;;

Milly: Um… sempai?

Meryl: WHAT NOW MILLY?!

Milly: O.o;; Um… err… we … need… a … goldfish! Yes, a goldfish! ^_^

Wolfwood: -_-;;

Milly: Yes a goldfish. Come sempai. Let's go buy a goldfish. ^_^ *drags Meryl along*

Meryl: Milly! Wait! O.O

Wolfwood: And there they go… O.ô;;

…

Wolfwood: Where is Tongari? I'm getting bored…

Vash: WOLFWOOD! *cries like a bady in Wolfwood shoulder*

Wolfwood: There he is… -_-;; Um, Tongari, when did you came there and why are you crying?

Vash: Rem… she… she… left me! BOO HOO! X,O

Wolfwood: What?! O.o

Vash: Alex, his boyfriend from Earth… is alive! ;_; Sniff!

Wolfwood: Really? That's great to hear!

Vash: But, but… I'm alone again! X,O

Wolfwood: Do you know what? You need a drink… that's all… come my friend. ^_^

Vash: Sniff. Sniff. Why are you so happy about it that Rem left me?! Sniff!!

Wolfwood: Well… I tell it later… come, let's go before Meryl and Milly comes back. ^_^

Vash: Sniff… sorrow… sniff… ;_;.

Wolfwood + Vash: *goes to the nearest bar*

(A/N: I just like to comments in every other moment… tee hee. I'm bit bored. ^o^;;)

O - O - O - O

:: Outside Of Knives' House ::

Legato: *hides in a bush* T_\\ Where is that bitch?

Dee: … *comes out of the house* … *looks around* … *goes for a walk* …

Legato: *follows Dee* T_\\

Kuroneko: *follows Legato* =T_T=

Hamtaro: *follows them all* =^.^=

(A/N: Hey! Who left the hamster gate open?! O.o)

O - O - O - O

Legato: *still following Dee* T_\\

Kuroneko: *still following Legato* =T.T=

Hamtaro: *still following everyone else* =^.^=

Dee: *thinking* Why is that blue haired idiot following me? T_T+ I guess, I need to kill him.

Legato: *takes out a book called 'How to kill evil robot women quickly' written by H. Imself* Hmm… "First you need to find another robot…" Another robot? Where can I found a one without a money?!

Grey the Ninelives: ^_______^

Legato: O.\\ Grey! Perfect!

Grey: ^_____________^

Legato: Then what… "Get the 2 robots together and the rest is history after that." Huh? Get together? T_\\

Kuroneko: Nya.

Legato: YOU!

Kuroneko: Nyo!

Hamtaro: Eeep! =^.^=

Legato: YOU! O.\\ Master will be really mad if he finds out that you are lost! *puts Hamtaro in his pocket*

Kuroneko: *nods and leaves* Nya! Nyo! =-.-=

Grey: ^____________^

Legato: Hey, he isn't your lunch cat! Go away! T_\\

Dee: Legato, what in the Earth are you yelling in the middle of the street? T_T

Legato: Can't you see I'm hiding behind a streetlamp? T_\\

Grey: ^_______^

Legato: T_\\

Book: *whispers to Legato* Get the robots together… together… together… (A/N: I admit! I have watch too much cartoons and read too much toilet comics! . YAARRR!!)

Legato: Dee, this is Grey the Ninelives. Would go out with him? T_\\;;

Grey: ^_______^

Dee: *.*

Grey: ^_____________^

Dee: *.*

Grey: ^_________________^

Dee: *.*

Grey: ^_______________________^

Dee: Will you marry me? *.*

Grey: ^_____________________________^

Legato: WHAT? O.\\

Grey: ^________________________________^

Dee: Really? *.*

Grey: ^__^

Dee: Then what are we waiting for? Let's go to Las Vegas! *.*

Grey: ^___________________________________^

Dee: Oh Grey! ^_^

Legato: O.\\ *speechless*

Dee + Grey: *leaves together hand by hand* ^___^

Legato: o.\\;;

Legato: o.\\;;

Legato: o.\\;;

Legato: o.\\;;

Legato: o.\\;;

Legato: o.\\;;

Legato: O.\\;;; What the fuck just happened?!!

Hamtaro: *in the pocket* =^.^= *eats Legato's hot dogs* (A/N: I'm sure Legato carries a extra hot dog in his pocket.)

O - O - O - O

Zazie: I love you. And you know that, don't you?

Zazie's Girlfriend: …

Zazie: What?!

Zazie's Girlfriend: …

Zazie: You don't love me anymore?!

Zazie's Girlfriend: …

Zazie: What?! You found a better one?!

Zazie's Girlfriend: …

Zazie: What?! A Thomas?!

Zazie's Girlfriend: …

Zazie: You are going to marry a Thomas?! O.O

Zazie's Girlfriend: …

Zazie: *cries like a baby* I hate you! I hate you, you… stupid… Thomas!

Lina: … T_T I don't understand you. You are weird. *leaves with her Thomas*

Thomas: Moo! -..-

Zazie: BOO HOO! ;_;

(A/N: Go Lina! XD)  
O - O - O - O

PopMonkey7: Well, folks, guess what…

Fred: What?

PM7: It was the end.

Fred: End of what?

Pm7: End of this fic, of course.

Fred: End? NO! I want to see Knives! He's so cute! //_^

Pm7: You can see him in my computer, Freddie. But yes, it's the end of this fic now. And it's time to for my shitty epilogue.

Fred: Where are you Knives?! *looks the black screen like a dumb monkey… err… donkey* I don't see him, PopMonkey7-chan.

Pm7: -_-;; I strongly believe you both Bluesummers are blonds… and you both are gay.

Fred: IS Legato gay?

Pm7: Well, let's talk about that later. ^_^ Um, anyway… the epilogue thingy stuff now!

"Zazie never recovered from his lost. He still cries after Lina, but after he met some odd fangirls, he forgot Lina and lived happy ever after…"

Fangirls: *gloms Zazie* Kawaii!

Zazie: ^_^ Tee hee.

Lina: Who is that kid anyway? T_T

"…Milly and Meryl bough a goldfish and Kuroneko ate it…"

Milly: Bad kitty! Bad! No food for you tonight!

Kuroneko #123: Nyo…. =u.u=

Milly: Aww! SO cute! *pets*

"…Meryl never spoke to Vash again…"

Meryl: … T_T …

Vash: Um, Meryl…

Meryl: …. T_T ….

Vash: I think I need a insurance…

Meryl: … T_T …

Vash: Tens of them.

Meryl: … T_T …

"…what wasn't surprising me. Dee and Grey went to Las Vegas and got married and now they are living in Hawaii…"

Dee: Oh Grey. ^_^

Grey: ^___________^

"…and Knives was very happy about it too…"

Knives: Look! Legato! I'm drunk! BWHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAA! *tap dancing on the table* WOO-HOO! I'm so drunk! Let's sing The Beer song! XD

Legato: -_\\;;

Gaine: T_T;;

Chapel: -_-;;

Hoppered: -.-;;

Rei: T_T

EG: .;;

Kuroneko: =T_T=

Dom: T_T;;

Hornfreak: T_T;; *stops playing Sylvia*

"By the way, Dominique and Hornfreak, never were together! So beat it, you stupid Hornfreak fangirl who flames me and said that it's so wrong."

Dom: T_T It was only a one night thing.

Hornfreak: ;_; I though you love me!

"Wolfwood is going to marry Milly someday… but before that he ahs a smoke or two…"

Wolfwood: -_-_?

"And Vash… well, his heart is still broken because Rem left him because of Alex. But don't worry, all the fangirls are all ready on their jobs…"

Fangirls: Oh poor Vashu-san. Have a donut.

Vash: Sniff! Sniff! Thank you! ;_;. *munch, munch*

Fangirls: Aww! Kawaii!!

"Damn, that I hate fangirls… By they way, The Ninelives bar went down since Grey left and because of the too many Kuronekos, the Black Cat Café went down too… BUT! The Longshot Bar is till open and Gunsmoke's most famous bar…"

Gaine: T_T I hate my life.

Everyone: HE SPEAKS!

Gaine: …

EG: Why you have never spoke?

Gaine: I didn't know what to say. I always forgot my lines. T_T

Everyone: *anime fall*

"Err… and then what happened to Hamtaro. Well, Knives once left the hamster gate open and Hamtaro got away and got hit my a truck."

Hamtaro fans: NO! ;_;

Pm7: YES! *devil sign*

:: Long Pause ::

Fred: PopMonkey7-chan?

Pm7: Yes?

Fred: What about you? What is going to happened to you?

Pm7: Well, since my company went down, I must run and fast. My dad didn't ever know that I took his money, so I'm sure that old bastard is all ready hunting me somewhere… so I'm will going soon. But what about, Fred? You know, you aren't going to be in any other fic, ever again.

Fred: I know, but that's okay. //_^ My darling is coming to get me soon and that's all what I need.

Pm7: Darling? What? You have a… lover?

Fred: *blushes* Um, yes. Teee hee! //_^ Oh there she comes.

Pm7: She?! O.O;;

Crimsonnail: C'mon Fred. Let's go. I need to go for a shopping. T_T

Fred: Yes, dear. //_^

Crimsonnail + Fred: *walks away together*

…

Pm7: O.o;;

Everyone: o.O;;;;;;

:: Another Long Pause ::

Pm7: . That's unfair! I wanna a real happy end! Not a weird one… again! I guess I need to write another chapter!

Trigun cast: NO! NO MORE CHAPTERS!

Pm7: *evil grin* Yes! Another chapter! This story needs 1 more chapter! So folks, this isn't the end! This is just the begin! What's out for the last chapter! XD JA NE! *tap dances away*

Everyone: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *runs and hides*

Knives: I'M SO DRUNK! XD

END OF PART 12 - TO BE CONTINUED IN PART 13! XD BWHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!! I fooled ya all!

  



	13. The Final Disaster :: yaoi ::

DATING DISASTER // PART 13 // THE FINAL DISASTER

A/N: Shounen-ai time! Sweet male x Male love, babe! This is my first time when I write yaoi stuff, but don't worry. Maybe kiss or 2 only… not fluffy, not hard… smooth maybe. ^.^ Enjoy, because I did when I wrote it. And you guys should know it all ready, I don't own Trigun.

PS. NO FLAMES THANKX!

^*^*^*^

Narrator: Long time ago or in the past, in planet named Gunsmoke, things had settle down after the dating chaos and other madness and everyone was living their humble little life's like they should…

Knives: …

Vash: O.o.;;

Knives: … .T_T

Vash: o.o.;;

Knives: …

Vash: O.o.;;

Knives: … .T_T

Vash: o.o.;;

Knives: Checkmate! XD

Vash: AH! YOU WON AGAIN! ;_;. And I lose my last donuts… sniff…

Knives: *takes the donuts* It's so great to be me. .^^

Vash: Sniff… my donuts… sniff… by the way why do you wanna have my donuts? You don't like donuts, Knivesu. Or do you?

Knives: I hate donuts. Just a worthless food of humans. … and they are for Legato, not for me. It's very expensive to keep Legato as my minion.

Legato: -_\\ Thank you Master for the donuts, but I don't deserve you kindness.

Vash: O.o.

Knives: .^_^

Vash: I have a feeling that, I don't wanna know anything else going on here.

Knives: It seems you have gone smarter since you saw that ugly spiders true nature. ._

Vash: Rem, isn't ugly or a spider. ..

Knives: Whatever, like I care…

Vash: Because you are so mean, I won't invite you to dinner tonight and I will leave now. See you tomorrow brother…

Knives: Like I care.

Vash: AW! You are always so mean to me, to everyone! I don't understand it! I hate you! XO

Knives: ._ So that's how it is … take your donuts and leave.

Vash: Bro…

Knives: I said Leave!

Vash: I didn't mean it, Knivesu. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you, brother…

Knives: Well, you all ready did it, so get over it and leave, Vashu. .T_T

Vash: Please, don't show me that cold face…

Knives: I can't help it, but I see a man, my own blood, my dear and only brother, who shot me 2 TIMES! What did you image to get from me, after I had been so long alone?! What?! Tell me, Vashu. Please - OH CRAP! THIS SUCKS! *kicks the donuts away*

Vash: ;_;, My lunch! 

PopMonkey7: CUT!

Knives: ARGH!

PM7: Knives! What's wrong now? This is the 7th time we try to shoot this scene and you just keep messing everything!

Vash: Shot? DO you mean kill? Is some trying to kill?! O.O

Knives: Oh shut up, Vashu… -_-;;

Pm7: Knives… why can't you act just a simple part? Or will I have to call a real actor for Hollywood to play you? A human actor!

Knives: No human can't play my part! Never!

Pm7: Then do you part! I wanna make this movie! I finally got some money and I want to spend it right!

Knives: You are just wasting your money! You could buy me a weapon that kills every darn human in this lousy planet with that money!  
  
Pm7: T_T Maybe I say a word now? You just lost a place from my dinner table. And I was going to make spaghetti tonight!

Knives: Whatever… I quiet. Legato!

Legato: -_\\ Yes Master?

Knives: .T_T

Legato: -_\\

Knives: .T_T Let's go… *leaves*

Pm7: Let's quite for this day! Let's try this tomorrow! Thanks everyone! _ …

^*^*^*^

:: At Knives' Hideout AKA Home ::

Knives: .T_T *watching Jerry Springer*

Legato: Master?

Knives: Yes Legato?

Legato: May I ask you a question?

Knives: You all ready did it.

Legato: Another question…

Knives. Okay…

Legato: Um, Master, is there something wrong? You seems to be tight mood today.

Knives: ._ … Glad you ask it… No! Nothing isn't right! That human trash named PopMonkey7 is making my life the worse that it has all ready been! And the movie… it's all so annoying and Vash is still crying after Rem… ANNOYING NONSENSE! . I want to kill everyone now!

Legato: Maybe we should order a pizza, Master.

Knives: .T_T+

Legato: I'm sorry Master. I shouldn't have speak. -_\\

Knives: Do me a favors and don't call me Master today. I'm just Knives today. .-_-

Legato: O.\\

Knives: Don't you dare give me that look, Legato!

Legato: I'm sorry, Master… err… Knives… sama… u_\\;;

Knives: I give up… -_-;; …I will go for a walk…

…

Legato: Bad Legato, bad! You pissed off your Master… *bangs his head on the wall* .\\

Kuroneko: Nyo. =u.u=

^*^*^*^

:: Home of Milly, Meryl, Vash & Wolfwood ::

Wolfwood: -_-_? Where's the remote, Tongari?

Vash: u_u.

Wolfwood: Tongari?

Vash: U_U.

Wolfwood: __? Tongari? Are you asleep?

Vash: Nope. Just thinking. u_u.

Wolfwood: What are you thinking?

Vash: Knives. There's something wrong with him… and I don't understand it…

Wolfwood: Well, he wasn't himself today, but you shouldn't think it so much or you get older.

Vash: Older, eh?

Wolfwood: Oh no… you are been serious now. O.o_?

Milly: *enters the house* I'm home! ^_^

Wolfwood: Hi Milly.

Milly: Did you miss me? *hugs Wolfwood*

Wolfwood: You were just shopping in the near mal… u.u

Meryl: *enters the room* Hi Wolfwood.

Wolfwood: Hi Meryl.

Meryl: *looks at Vash* T_T

Vash: Hi Meryl.

Meryl: *walks away*

Wolfwood: Seems that she won't talk to you, whatever happened…

Vash: -_-.;;

Milly: Mr. Vash. You seems to be down today. Do you wanna a donut?

Vash: No thanks. I will go for a walk now.

Wolfwood: I will come with you. I need to go buy more cigarettes. Bye Milly.

Milly: Bye, bye boys! ^______^

:: Later At The Park ::

Wolfwood: Hey Tongari. Is something wrong? You can always tell me…

Vash: Well… I think I'm lonely and…

Wolfwood: And?

Vash: Knives hates me.

Wolfwood: No he doesn't. He would never hate you. Remember Vash, it just a movie and Knives is mean to be cold to you at that scene. And why do you feel like you are lonely? 

Vash: Well, Rem…

Wolfwood: She cares about you, but not as lover… at least I think so. But you just now think too much… relax…

Vash: You have been awful kind to me lately, Wolfwood. Why?

Wolfwood: Wanna hear the truth? The truth that I don't wanna marry Milly?

Vash: Um, maybe… yes…

Wolfwood: Because…

Vash: Because?

Wolfwood: Because of this… *suddenly kisses Vash* …I simple like you…

Vash: *blushing and speechless* O.O.

Wolfwood: You are just a moron. I have been liking you for a long time, but you just don't see it… -_-_?

Vash: O.O. … you don't like Milly?

(A/N: Wolfwood & Milly are so cute together, but Vash and Wolfwood… just perfect! XD )

Wolfwood: Sure, I like her… but… I… you… err… would you … like to go in a motel now?

Vash: WHAT?! O.O.

Wolfwood: Err, yes… u_u;;

Vash: Um… errr… *blushes* …I… need a drink…

Wolfwood: I will buy you a one for apologize of my behaves… sorry Vash... 

Vash: Well, to be honest… it wasn't that mad… we maybe should go to motel, if you will pay. ^///^.

* insert sweet love scene in the motel here and fangirls screaming in the background *

^*^*^*^

Knives: *comes back home* .O.O

Legato: Master… I mean Knives! Are you all right?

Knives: .O.O *shocked* I saw my brother in the park…

Legato: And?

Knives: And he's gay. *more shocked* .O.O

Legato: What?!

Knives: I think I will go back to my lightbuld and never come out of there. .O.O

Legato: ;_\\

Knives: .T_T What is that look?

Legato: Um…

Knives: Spit it out, Legato. .T_T

Legato: I… don't want you… to go… Knives. -_\\

Knives: .o.ô What do you mean, Legato?

Legato: Nothing… please, ignore what I said, Knives. -_\\

Knives: Well, I can't, since you are calling me by my name, Legato.

Legato: u_\\

Knives: Hmm… changes in plan. Legato, would you come to my room for a sec?

Legato: Yes, Knives. -_\\ *follows Knives*

^*^*^*^

:: Later At The Gung-Ho Guns Hideout ::

Legato: *enters the place* ^_\\ Hello everyone!

GHG: o.O

Legato: We have a mission from our great Master! ^_\\

Hornfreak: And what is?

Legato: Make Vash the Gay Stampede suffer! ^_\\

Zazie: Again?! But I don't wanna!

Legato: How dare you ignore my Masters orders! .\\

Dom: Legato? What with you? You seems to be over happy about this mission.

Legato: Me? Over happy? You would be too after what he did to me! ^_\\

Hoppered: Too much information!

EG Mine: I don't wanna image what he did to you! O.o;;

Zazie: *shocked* O.o

Gaine: T_T

Rei: You demon.

Legato: Oh shut up! Now! Go and make Vash suffer! ^_\\ Tee hee.

Hornfreak: That was disgusting. .

:: Soon ::

Knives: Did you ordered those dumbasses to make Vash suffer?

Legato: Yes, Knives. ^_\\

Knives: Good. And now is for your reward. *hentai grin*

* Insert NC-147 stuff here XD *

^*^*^*^

Pm7: Hide, must hide! Place to hide!

Fred: Hi PopMonkey7-chan! //_^

Pm7: Freddie! O.O Oh Fred! *hugs* Nice to see ya again!

Fred: It always so wonderful to see ya, PopMonkey7-chan. //_^

Pm7: What are you doing here, Fred? I though you were in Hawaii.

Fred: Well, Elendira-dear wanted to come visit here.

Pm7: Did you have fun in Hawaii?

Fred: Oh yes. But maye I ask why you want to hide?

Pm7: Well, I used my dads money, again… and he doesn't know…. But soon he will. The bill came from the unfinished movie what I was making. -_-;; And I will be dead soon… Hey, do you know any good hide place?

Fred: Well… one. I hope Elendira-dear doesn't mind if I give this to you. *gives 3 tickets *

Pm7: 3 tickets to … TOKYO?

Fred: Yes, me, Elendira-dear and Kuroneko-sama were about to go there, but I can always buy a new one. I own you this. Without you I wouldn't never meet my sweet love, my Elendira-dear. //_^

Pm7: Oh thank you, Freddie.

Crimsonnail: FRED! C'mon the sales are not waiting forever! I need 20 new dresses!

Fred: Coming dear! //_^ Bye, PopMonkey7-chan.

Pm7: *.* Tokyo! Anime… manga… paradise!

:: Later in the airport ::

Pm7: Simp! Candy! Wazzap!

Simp: Wazzaap!

Candy: S'up!

Pm7: Let's go! All the anime and manga stores are waiting for me!

Candy + Simp: Hai! ^_^

Pm7: And read readers, thanks for reading this shitty story of mine and see you in next time, when I come back from Tokyo with new stories! XD Ja ne minna!

Trigun Cast: Bye, bye! Have a nice trip and remember not to come back! ^_^

Pm7: You wish! XP Darn, that I'm not good keeping promises. So sorry Knives that I wrote yaoi about you. ^.^;;

Knives: I think, I can forgive you that. Rigth, Legato?

Legato: ^_\\ Right.

Pm7: Ah, I just love happy endings! XD

Candy + Simp: So do we! XP

THE END  



End file.
